Express Yourself | The COMMUNICATES Game

If you’re an introvert, sensitive, people pleaser, who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms, stay tuned for fun and valuable information.

Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the Communicates Warrior Game video series, or what I like to call COMMUNICATES Game.

Now, if you have missed the other videos in this video series, that’s okay, stay here for now, you can always catch up with those other videos later on. So in this video, today, we’re going to talk about expressing yourself. There are many ways you can express yourself. Certainly one of the ways is through words, right verbal communication. So the words, the tone of voice, the body language, the facial expressions, the hand gestures. But of course, you can also communicate in written format, right, in writing. And you can also communicate and express yourself through art, right, just even painting, sculpting, drawing, or music, dancing. So you can see there’s other ways to communicate and express yourself, not necessarily all the time with verbal communication. But of course, in this video series, the main focus has been on verbal communication.

But today we’re going to be talking about expressing your self, and we’re going to use the communication characters, in talking about how each of the characters might express him or herself. So let’s get started.

All right, so our first communication character is Stance our confident communicator. All right, so their’s Stance. Now Stance because Stance’s is a confident person, we would expect that Stance is going to express him or herself with confidence. And what might that look like? Well Stance is going to be able to do things and do things well. That will be you know, communicating verbally written some performance of some sort, either through art, music, whatever it is, Stance is going to do it with confidence, you know, shoulders back, back, straight smile on the face, if it’s appropriate. And if Stance happens to make a misstep Stance is going to be able to pivot quickly. And you know, do it with confidence. But in most cases, you might not even have known that Stance made an error because they just know how to carry on. Right. So it almost feels like when Stance is expressing him or herself, they know exactly what to do to avoid any missteps. It’s almost like you don’t really see any missteps at all. And if it does happen, you don’t even realize it. Why? Because they just have that confidence, like you know what, I can carry on no matter what, however, they express themselves. They just know what to do. And they’re not afraid if something goes wrong, because they have the confidence to know how to pivot and perhaps even how to repair it, maybe even a way that you didn’t even know that they had made a mistake in the first place. All right, so that is Stance.

Okay, and our next communication character is Brash. Now Brash is our arrogant communicator. So how is Brash going to express him or herself? Well, we expect that Brash is going to take up space, right? So we suspect that Brash is going to express him or herself in a big way, perhaps, you know, using big movements, or over the top way of, you know, expressing him or herself either through music, the clothing they wear, or art, whatever it is, they’re gonna make a big splash, right? Because they just want to shine. That’s how Brash just might be right? Because, again, Brash wants to shine. So have a way to, you know, make sure that Brash is standing out. So big movements, big splashes, you know, it could be in clothing, it could be in the way they carry themselves with their tone of voice or their volume. involve their voice or even their body language and even in their performance, right? If they’re underperforming, perhaps you know through their art, music, whatever it might be, that might be how Brash express him or herself, because again, they like to shine, and they want– and they like to stand out.

Okay, so our next communication character is Gray, and Gray is our timid communicator. So as you can see, Gray is wanting to kind of blend in, right. So when Gray communicates or express him or herself is probably going to be more in a gentle, quiet way. Right, you might find that Gray might prefer to draw or paint or do something to express him or herself. Maybe it’s dance, and it might be some gentle dances, or it might be, you know, any type of dance. However, again, it’s being with the other crowds, right with other people. And if Gray does perform or express him or herself, there’s nobody else around Gray might do it in a very quiet, subtle way of expressing him or herself. Gray might be also a type of person that prefers writing, rather than verbal. Might prefer, you know, sometimes to express him or herself through the art, right, because it’s all very just inward, and away from other people. Again, Gray, may just prefer to express him or herself through quiet needs, writing, painting, drawing, you know, that type of thing. So, that’s Gray.

And then of course, we have Blend our Shapeshifter communicator. And so Blend, of course, is going to be able to read the room, read the situation, figure out what would be best in expressing him or herself in that situation. So Blend, being the shapeshifter kind of is able to like say, okay, you know, this is more of a quiet mood. So express him or herself in more in a quiet way. Perhaps if you know, Blend is more in a kind of party situation, right? Then Blend is going to be able to express him or herself more in that party mood type of situation. If it calls for that confidence Blend can also be that confidence again, Blend is that type of person, you know, that is able to kind of see what’s going on and almost feel very comfortable and kind of going in this direction or in that direction, right, because again, Blend is our shapeshifter. So for Blend, it’s going to be very easy for Blend to decide, you know how he or she is going to express him or herself, depending upon the situation. And you know, the person they– that they are with, they feel very comfortable and almost playing all different parts at the same time. Because they just have that ability to like shapeshift, right. So Blend can just express him or herself accordingly to whichever situation or group that he or she is in. So it might be if it’s requires to be quiet, they’re okay with that if it requires them to be kind of loud, they’re also okay with that. And if they requires them to be, you know, more confidence and just kind of being able to go with it. They’re okay with that too. Right. So that is Blend our Shapeshifter communicator.

And this is you as the Communication Warrior, where you are standing up nice and tall and you’re able to communicate all of your thoughts, feelings and desires, and you’re able to express yourself the way you want to express yourself. So if you want to express yourself with confidence, you’re able to do that. If you want to express yourself in a way that makes you look like you’re shining and you’re standing out. You can do that. If you want to communicate in a way that you just want to have some quietness, where you just want to draw or paint or something to express yourself through art form. You can do that. You know how to express yourself in your own way that is authentic to you. Because you are the Communication Warrior.

And if you don’t feel like you’re a Communication Warrior yet, that’s okay. Because I’m going to invite you to book a free communication breakthrough session with me by visiting my website GraceSOULutions.com That’s GraceSOULutions.com where we will discover five obstacles that is stopping you. And one thing that you can do to help you to move forward so that you can start to be confident in communicating your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms, so that you can have that happy and harmonious relationship with your partner through communication. And the next video, we’re going to be talking about communication styles. So I’ll see you here next time for that.

And in the meantime, go have fun communicating!

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Express Yourself)

There are many different ways that you can communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires.

One of the ways is through body language and facial expression (which I wrote about in one of my previous blog posts). The majority of the blog articles I have written have had to do with verbal expression in communication. This mainly refers to spoken words and tone of voice.

For some of you, you might find it easier to express yourself through written expression or perhaps through artistic expression. You might find that it’s easier for you to gain more clarity of what you’re thinking, feeling, and wanting through drawing, painting, dancing, playing or listening to music, or journaling.

You also might find that before you verbally express your thoughts, feelings, or desires to your partner that you first need to process and gain clarity on what exactly it is that you’re thinking, feeling, and wanting.

Using some of the modalities (again, such as drawing, dancing, journaling) might help you to process what you’re feeling and help you figure out on the best way to communicate your feelings and what it is you really want from your partner.

Sometimes you might not be able to put it down into words or find the right way to describe or communicate what it is you want to express. This is when artistic expression may come in handy. This could be things such as: drawing an abstract picture of what you’re feeling, dancing to the mood of the music you’re feeling drawn to, or just writing any words that comes to your mind into a notebook journal.

First you need to have clarity on what it is your thinking, feeling, and wanting. Then you can better communicate that to your partner.

If you’re feeling confused and muddled as to your own thoughts, feelings, and desires and you can’t even communicate them clearly to yourself, then how you’re going to communicate clearly to your partner so that they can understand you?

Artistic expression can help you to process and understand yourself first so that you know what it is that you want to communicate to your partner so that you can get the support you want from them.

When you can openly, honestly, and clearly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires to your partner then you will feel supported and that will nurture a happy and harmonious relationship.

It’s also up to you if you would rather directly show your artistic expression to your partner as a way to communicate to them. Artistic expression can be incredibly personalized so it’s entirely up to you what and how you choose to share.

For some of you, you might find it easier to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires through a written expression such as writing a letter.

You might choose to write a letter to your partner to tell him or her what you’re deeply thinking, feeling, and wanting because you might find it easier to communicate it this way instead of outright saying it.

You might be asking “is there a tone of voice through written expression? Is it just as effective as when speaking out loud?” The answer is yes to both.

There is a tone of voice in written expression through the words and sentences you put into the letter, the pressure of your writing the individual characters and how you craft the sentences, and where you choose to place emphasis in your letter. Writing a letter to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires can end up being just as effective as verbal communication.

Perhaps in some situations you might find it easier to openly and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires in the letter format or through any number of written expression formats rather than straight verbal expression because you’re afraid to see your partner’s reaction.

Sometimes by allowing time to process the information (such as reading a letter), and then discussing it afterwards when everyone has had time to process their own feelings may make it easier to have constructive conversation about what was written to discuss it further.

There are so many different ways to communicate. It’s ultimately about you choosing the modality to express yourself (whether that be through verbal, written or artistic) so that you can openly and honestly communicate using what you have chosen in order to clearly communicate with your partner.

Sometimes you may choose to use just one or a combination of artistic expression methods to help you to gain clarity on your own thoughts, feelings, and desires so that you know exactly what it is you want to communicate.

Your goal is to have it so your partner could clearly hear and understand what it was you communicated to him or her because you were clear about your own thoughts, feelings, and desires.

 

 

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re able to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires clearly, openly, and honestly.

There are times that you might not feel you’re able to clearly, openly, and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires through verbal expression.

You might instead be able to clearly, openly, and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires through other means of communication such as written or artistic expression.

If you managed to clearly, openly, and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires using verbal, written, or artistic expression to communicate with your partner without fear of argument or criticism…That’s a win!

If you couldn’t clearly, openly and honestly communicate with your partner with using any of the communication modalities, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be:

  • What can you do differently next time or what communication modality can you use next time so that you can communicate more clearly, openly, and honestly?
  • Why do you think you held yourself back from being able to communicate more clearly, openly, and honestly?
  • What can you do better next time?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of the character you want to portray and hold yourself accountable when expressing yourself.

This is the Communication Warrior.

You know your way to express yourself… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a Communication Warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping your from becoming a Communication Warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Tone of Voice | The COMMUNICATES Game

If you’re an introvert, sensitive, people pleaser, who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms: Stay tuned for fun and valuable information.

Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the COMMUNICATES game video series, or what I like to call the COMMUNICATES game. Now, if you have missed the previous videos in this series, don’t worry, stay here for now, you can always catch up with the previous videos that I have recorded in this video series later on. So today in this video, we’re going to be talking about Tone of Voice.

Tone of Voice

Now, you know how sometimes somebody’s tone of voice can either uplift you or annoy you, or even perhaps trigger you. So sometimes one person’s voice may be uplifting to one person, but that same tone of voice can either be triggering or annoying to another person. So a tone of voice can almost be subjective, it’s almost depending on how the person perceives that voice or the tone of voice. So somebody who might have a sarcastic personality might have a sarcastic tone of voice. And for one person, they will be okay with that. And then to another person, it might be very triggering. It’s all about the perception. And based on your experiences, and how you’re feeling that day, that tone of voice can either be okay. Or it could be “what the heck.” So we’re going to use the communication characters to talk about the tone of voice. Now, I like to preface that the character that we’re going through, I’m only going to generalized, what the tone of voice might be for the communication characters. So for example, Stance is our confident communicator, and we suspect that Stance will have a certain tone of voice. But it doesn’t mean that Stance can’t have a sarcastic tone of voice. Stance can easily also be a soft spoken, gentle person that has a very gentle soft spoken tone of voice neutral Stance can also show an aggressive tone of voice, it doesn’t matter, there’s all these characters can have all the tone of voices out there. But generally, when we associate a person like who is confident, generally we suspect that that person will have a particular tone of voice. So I’m going to be just talking about a general sense of what tone of voice that the characters may have. So having said that, let’s get started.

Stance – The Confident Communicator

So again, our first character is Stance and Stance is our confident communicator. Alright, so here is Stance. Now Stance, who is our confident communicator, obviously, we’re going to expect that Stance is going to have a confident tone of voice. So what does that mean? Well, most likely Stance is going to have perhaps more of that assertive tone of voice, maybe that no-nonsense Stance could also have that uplifting tone of voice, not like a high pitch or anything like that. But just an uplifting spirit of such that kind of like, makes you feel like “yes, I can do it” right? In a very assertive, no-nonsense kind of way but still very up lifting, that is kind of the tone of voice that we would expect that most of the confident communicators would have. Again, just because Stance is confident and you know, we in generalizing that they would have that sort of tone of voice Stance can easily still have, like I mentioned earlier, a sarcastic tone of voice an aggressive tone of voice, a soft spoken tone of voice anything it’s just, again, Stance is just going to use the tone of voice but it’s going to show that confidence that no-nonsense. Alright. So our next communicator is Brash and Brash is our arrogant communicator.

Brash – The Arrogant Communicator

So this is Brash, our arrogant communicator. And so because Brash has that “out there” type of person banality like likes to shine and be there. And so we might suspect that Brash, his tone of voice, might come off as aggressive and Brash might also have a sarcastic personality. So perhaps might even have a sarcastic tone of voice, just because it depends on the situation. So, you know, again, if Brash is wanting to show like, “Yes, I can, you know, I’m best in this,” or what have, you might show more of that aggression, that more aggressive tone of voice. Brash, can easily have more of a, you know, down to earth tone of voice as well, we just don’t know. Right? You know, it depends on the situation. However, because of the big personality, we, as we suspect that most in most cases, in a general sense, that Brash is going to have that more aggressive, that big personality, type of tone of voice.

Gray – The Timid Communicator

And then we have Gray, our timid communicator. So as you can see, in the picture, Gray is very much wanting to be in a background, right, because you can see the posture and everything. So Gray probably would like to hide, be kind of like blending into the background, hang in the back. So what is the tone of voice that would kind of not draw attention to Gray? That would probably be like this soft and gentle tone of voice, right? Because if you think about like water, you know, being very gentle kind of going with the flow, you can kind of feel like Gray is going to be that type of like, “I don’t want to bring attention to myself.” So Gray is most likely going to have that tone of voice, that will likely not draw attention to him or herself. Having said that, the tone of voice that would likely not draw attention would be that soft and gentle tone of voice. However, that doesn’t mean that Gray can’t be assertive, or have that, you know, uplifting tone of voice and what have you. Certainly Gray can still have that, but perhaps it’s not as big, right? It can perhaps be toned down a bit, even though Gray might have that assertiveness– to it the tone of voice of assertiveness to it, but also might be toned down a little bit. So there’s a bit of softness to it or gentleness to it as well. So again, we’re just generalizing, but certainly in some situations, where Gray might be really comfortable, who knows. Gray might then all of a sudden become that really big, uplifting, you know, person with a big tone of– with a loud tone of voice Who knows, right? Depending on situations but in general, we suspect that Gray will have more of that gentle, a lower tone of voice and and softer tone of voice. Okay, and then we have Blend.

Blend – The Shapeshifter Communicator

Blend is our Shapeshifter communicator. So even though Blend is able to read the room and situations, you know, Blend is going to choose the tone of voice that most likely will best fit the person or in that situation. However, it doesn’t mean that Blend is always going to perhaps choose the right tone of voice to use. Remember, everybody has their own perceptions and some tone of voice can be uplifting to one person, it can be triggering to another person, that same tone of voice that can be uplifting to one can also be triggering for another. However, Blend is most likely also going to be able to kind of figure out which tone of voice might be better for that room or for that situations. But if Blend happens to use the wrong tone of voice Blend might be able to quickly switch and figure out which one will be next best just to kind of make sure that the conversations carry on.

You – The Communication Warrior

And this is what we want for You: You as the Communication Warrior. So this is you as the communication warrior, where you are open and confident in communicating your thoughts feelings and desires with using the right tone of voice that fit with the person and the situation that you are in. However, if you happen to choose the wrong tone of voice, you are the communication warrior. You know how to fix it you know how to shift to a different tone of waste that perhaps that will help you to carry on to have that conversation. Because after all, you no longer are afraid, like, Oops, you don’t know what to do. You’re the communication warrior. You didn’t get the right tone of voice, you know exactly what to do to make sure that it gets shifted in the right direction so that you can continue to have that productive conversation.

But if you don’t feel like you’re a communication warrior yet, that’s okay. I’m going to invite you to visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com. That’s GraceSOULutions.com to book a free Communication Breakthrough Session, where we will discover five challenges or obstacles that are standing in your way, and one action step that you can do that will help you to move forward. And in the next videos, we’re going to see how the communication characters deal with expressing themselves. So stay tuned for that.

And in the meantime, go have fun communicating!

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Tone of Voice)

Do certain noises or sounds make you happy while other noises or sounds can annoy you?

What do you feel when you hear an ice cream van? Happy or perhaps nostalgic.

What about a siren? Most likely annoyed by the loud sound of a siren.

Your tone of voice can be the same way.

Some tones of voice may make you feel happy and supported while other tones of voice may negatively trigger you.

Have you ever heard someone say to you, you better watch your tone of voice or don’t give me that tone of voice?

Or perhaps you have said those exact statements to your partner.

Why?

Because the tone of voice somehow triggered you.

Perhaps your partner said something to you in passing and because of his or her tone of voice, you picked it up wrong and say something like, what’s wrong with you, why you’re using that tone of voice with me?

Or what’s with that tone of voice you just used?

Your partner might not have meant anything by it, but because of his or her tone of voice, it just set something off in you like a firecracker or vice versa.

Tone of voice can be subjective, and the tone might sound one way to one person it can sound completely different to another person.

For example, a happy uplifting tone can sound like you’re being cheered on by one person where to another person it might sound as if he or she is being mocked.

Mocked for not being able to do something, the uplifting tone is just to rubbing it in that he or she can’t do it, and it’s a fake cheer rather than an actual genuine cheer or support.

To the person who feels he or she is being mocked the person with the happy and uplifting tone is actually being sincere; however, his or her tone of voice is picked up wrong by the person feeling mocked.

Some people are sensitive to the tone of voice.

He or she is sensitive to how the tone of voice sounds because he or she is sensing the person’s mood and the true feeling behind the statement that delivered.

Some people are not bothered by an aggressive tone or sarcastic tone, and others can be.

If you’re a sensitive, introverted, and conflict-phobic person, then some tone of voice may bother you or you may be more sensitive to some tones of voice than others such as you might be more sensitive and bothered by an aggressive tone versus calming tone.

For some people a calming tone may sound like the person is bored or don’t have any emotions.

Everyone might agree with what an aggressive tone may sound like, a happy tone, a sad tone, or calming tone, etc.

However, not everyone is going to agree that that’s the tone that the person used and not everyone is going to be comfortable or be accepting of a tone of voice that was used.

Knowing what tone of voice, you’re comfortable with and the ones that trigger you the wrong way will help you to communicate to your partner which tones of voice to use more often when communicating with you so that you feel supported by your partner rather than leaving you feeling lonely and misunderstood.

Also, knowing the tone of voice that you use that uplifts or triggers your partner will help you to use more of the tone of voice that uplifts rather than triggers your partner so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship.

 

Tone of voice is subjective. You might be okay with some tones of voice and other tones of voice might trigger you and the same can be said for your partner.

It’s about being aware of your tone of voice and knowing which tones of voice uplifts you and which one triggers you as well as knowing which one uplifts and triggers your partner.

Using the tone of voice that uplifts and supports you and your partner when communicating so that you and your partner both feel supported when communicating with each other for a better and deeper personal relationship.

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re aware that tone of voice can be subjective.

Knowing and using the tone of voice that uplifts you and your partner when communicating to form a better connection.

Avoid using the tone of voice that triggers you and your partner.

If you managed to use the tone of voice that uplifts you and your partner to form a closer connection…That’s a win!

If you and your partner sometimes used the tone of voice that triggered rather than uplifted each other in your communication, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be what can you do differently next time to use the tone of voice that will uplift or show support for your partner? Why do you think the tone of voice you used or your partner used triggered you or your partner? What can you do better next time?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of the character you want to portray and hold yourself accountable with the tone of voice you used in your communication.

This is the Communication Warrior.

You know your way to your tone of voice… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Awareness of Words and Actions)

Sometimes you can become upset, even overwhelmingly so, that you might not be aware of your actions.

You might not even be aware of the words that are coming out of your mouth.

You know you’re angry and upset, and your expression shows it.

How aware are you of what you’re saying and acting during the moment of anger?

Do you later regret your actions and what’ve you said during the heat of the moment?

Do you wonder what you did or said while you were upset?

You might’ve felt like it was an out of body experience and something, maybe some kind of energy took over you, and you felt like you had no control over your mind and body.

You just acted out and said what you said because you were just that angry and you just let whatever came to your brain fly out.

What if you stopped for a moment and took a good look at your actions and words as if you were an outsider observing your situation?

If you were the observer, what would you think or say about the situation you just observed of someone yelling, hitting, swearing, etc. during the heat of the moment?

Would it scare you or would you think “if it was me, I would do xyz?”

It’s easy to say what you would do differently when you’re calm and not in that moment. But what if you were in that moment?

Could you stop yourself and take a pause so that you didn’t continue the destructive path?

Could you say to yourself, “no, enough of this, we can disagree and have a constructive conversation through our disagreement?”

What would a constructive conversation during a heated disagreement look like?

How could you have that constructive conversation during a dispute when you’re upset and angry?

Afterall, this is real life and you’re not on some tv show where the scripts are written out and you memorize the lines during an argument.

There are, however, some things you can do.

Yes, I’m well aware of what I’m going to share with you will sound easy. But it may feel hard to do especially when you’re upset and angry.

It’s easy to give advice, and to follow suggestions when you’re calm and not involved in the moment.

This is where awareness becomes important. When you’re aware you can take control of the situation before the situation takes control of you.

The first thing is to be aware of your mind and body. Be aware of your thoughts and how your body is feeling.

Be aware of when you know you’re going to explode and stop yourself by taking a deep breath.

Now take a few more deep breaths.

This is the challenging part; however, remember that you’re in control.

While the other person might be speaking or yelling, restrain yourself from reacting, and continue to take deep breaths until you’re in enough control to address the situation.

Actively notice what you’re noticing, be aware of your surroundings, and the feelings in your body.

The next tricky part: you’re not going to react, you’re going to respond by being mindful of the words that you say.

The words are deliberate and you know exactly what you’re saying with conscious thought.

You’re no longer saying the first thing that comes out of your brain.

You’re being mindful of exactly what you’re saying to express your feelings, and you have the awareness of the way you’re delivering the message with the use of your body language, facial expression, and tone of voice.

You’re in control of the situation through the awareness of the words you’re saying and how you’re saying it with the use of your body language, facial expressions, gestures, and tone of voice during the argument.

When the situation or argument is controlling you, you lose your awareness, and that is when you say whatever comes out of your mouth, and act and behave whatever reflexively comes to you.

 

 

Do you want to be in control, or do you want the situation and argument to control you?

 

The take away here is to be aware of your words and actions so that you’re in control of the situation or argument and not the other way around.

I’m not going to say that it is easy to do; however, it can be done with practice.

Practice being mindful of your words and actions during any conversation whether it be while you’re calm or in an argument with your partner is the start to awareness.

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re aware of your words and actions especially during the heat of an argument.

There are times where the situation or argument might get the best of you; however, were able to stop it or reduce the destructive conversation?

If you managed to control the situation and argument through awareness of your words and actions… That’s a win!

If you allowed moments of the situation or argument getting the best of you, and controlled you rather than you controlling it, then guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be:

  • What can you do differently next time so that you can control the situation or argument through awareness?
  • Why did you lose control of your words or anger in the first place?
  • What can you do better so that you’re more aware of your words and actions during an argument next time?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of the character you want to portray and hold yourself accountable when you want to be in control of the situation or argument and not the other way around.

This is the Communication Warrior.

 

You know your way to becoming aware of your words and actions… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Choose Your Path)

Everyone has a certain path or journey that he or she is traveling on during his or her lifetime.

Including you.

As you travel on your path during your journey, choices or opportunities will be presented to you.

You will look at your opportunities and choices and decide the one that is best for you at that moment.

Sometimes the choices you make (or want to make) may not make sense to the people you have relationships with.

I will share with you, my story.

When I decided and chose to be an entrepreneur or solopreneur, my husband couldn’t understand why I would go down this path when I had a steady job as a speech-language pathologist.

I earned a good income working in hospitals and as a travel therapist.

I wanted time, money, and freedom and chose a path where I could dictate my own time and money.

I couldn’t see myself having time and money freedom if I continued to work as a speech-language pathologist.

I can honestly tell you that my husband didn’t like my decision in choosing to be a solopreneur and giving up a steady income; however, that is the path I have chosen, and I have stuck with it.

Is it stubbornness on my part? Perhaps.

Is it that I believe in myself and believe that I can do it and succeed as a solopreneur? Absolutely!

My husband is supportive with what I am doing and working on, and he does his best to show his support.

I am more of a risk taker than my husband, if you can’t tell already.

I appreciate him doing his best to show his support even if he might not agree with my choice or decision.

Sometimes that will happen. Either you’ll make the choice that your partner doesn’t agree with or vice versa.

Here’s the thing.

Your partner can still support you and show their support even if they doesn’t agree with you and vice versa.

If you want to have a happy and harmonious relationship, then you are going to have to allow the person to make certain choices or decisions for themselves that differ from yours.

You want to be able to communicate your thoughts of choices or decisions you want to make for yourselves. That will benefit you and your partner.

Likewise, you want your partner to feel like they can communicate to you their thoughts about choices or decisions they want to make to better your lives together.

Sometimes your partner (or you) may not be comfortable with the choice or decision that is presented because of fear.

Fear of failure, fear of money (lack of money), fear of (fill-in-the-blank), and what-ifs (something bad happens).

Fear is good at keeping people and you at status quo.

When you follow your heart and do what you love, then you’ll be able to conquer your fear.

Afterall there is a saying, “Love can conquer fear.”

I’m not going to say that you won’t encounter obstacles and challenges along the way because you will.

I’ve had encountered my fair share of challenges and obstacles along my journey.

What I will say is that you’ll be able to overcome your obstacles and challenges because everything is figureoutable.

That I know from my own personal experience.

I would also like to add that…

Choose Your Path can also mean that you are choosing activities that will benefit your relationship with your partner such as choosing the way you communicate so that you can have more constructive conversations rather than destructive conversations with your partner.

Choosing to be aware of the way you communicate and how you communicate with your partner, choices or decisions will be presented to you during your lifetime and you want to be able to communicate your choices or decisions with your partner.

Your partner should also feel like they can communicate their choices or decisions with you.

The choices or decisions may be presented to the individual; however, the choice or decision made may impact the relationship.

Likely the choice or decision made will be the one that would benefit the relationship.

It’s about choosing the path, being able to discuss your choices and decisions. Having that support even if the person disagrees with you.

Also, choosing to have constructive conversations rather than destructive conversations when discussing choices or decisions.

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you allow the person to make the choice or decision that is best for him or her and give support even if you don’t agree.

The choice or decision made will benefit the relationship rather than hinder the relationship.

If you managed to openly communicate your thoughts and the choices or decisions you’re making, and your partner supports you even if he or she might not agree with you…That’s a win!

If you and your partner couldn’t openly communicate thoughts, and the choices or decisions because of fear, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be:

  • What can you do differently next time so that you can share your thoughts and choices while asking for support?
  • What are the fears towards the choices or decisions?
  • Why do you have these fears?
  • What can you do to have constructive conversation when sharing your choices or decisions when partner doesn’t or might not agree with you?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of the character you want to portray and hold yourself accountable when making the choice or decision that will be best for you and that will benefit you and your partner.

This is the Communication Warrior.

You know your way to choose your path… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

GraceSOULutions Featured In Influencer Daily

I’m so excited to announce that I was featured in Influencer Daily!

Here is a brief excerpt from the article:

In a world where effective communication is paramount to successful relationships, Grace CW Liu, an expert Communication Navigator, is empowering sensitive, introverted women to confidently express their thoughts, feelings, and desires. Through her innovative approach at GraceSOULutions, Grace helps individuals and couples cultivate healthy communication strategies, fostering deep connection and understanding in personal relationships.

Communication lies at the heart of any thriving relationship, and Grace understands its true power. Drawing from her extensive background as a speech-language pathologist, she brings a unique perspective to the realm of communication, helping women discover their own communication style and recognizing the impact of their language on conversations. By providing this invaluable knowledge, even the most soft-spoken individuals can express themselves with ease, ensuring their voices are heard.

You can read the full article here:

Read The Full Article

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Inspiration)

It doesn’t matter if you’re playing an actual board game, sports, the game of life, or a communication game, who doesn’t want to be inspired or want to inspire?

The definition of inspire means “to make someone feel that they want to do something and can do it”.

You can have a fun and constructive communication with your partner so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship.

You and your partner can inspire each other to have constructive communication where you can openly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without argument and criticism so that you’re feeling heard and understood.

Relationships are like a garden. Communication is part of that garden.

In order to have a beautiful and plentiful garden you need to tend to it and relationships are the same way.

In your garden you might plant some flowers and vegetables like roses and tomatoes.

The flowers and vegetables grow when they have been properly taken care of such as getting rid of weeds or pests.

It’s the same way with your relationships. For you to create a happy and harmonious relationship you need to cultivate your communication by getting rid of destructive communication.

You can cultivate a fun and constructive communication by being open-minded, willing to listen without judgement, throwing in some humor when appropriate, being supportive, and be inspired or inspire your partner.

You can inspire each other to have a happy and harmonious relationship by cultivating your communication so that it continues to grow and maintain good health.

The truth is that if you don’t cultivate (and continue to cultivate) your communication, then, like weeds that grow in the garden that can kill your flowers and vegetables, destructive communication can cause massive problems.

Destructive communication can smother and kill your relationships.

When communication is destructive with an abundance of arguments, criticism, an unwillingness to listen, this leads to a path of unwillingness to communicate. And when partners no longer want or think they can communicate with each other, then the relationship will deteriorate.

You can choose whether or not you want a happy and harmonious relationship. If you do then one of the important parts to having a happy and harmonious relationship is being able to communicate with one another.

That is the inspiration of cultivating constructive communication.

The truth is that you do have to work on cultivating your communication if you want to grow and have a happy and harmonious personal relationship.

Cultivating your communication doesn’t have to be hard work if you consistently work on it.

Just think of your relationship as your garden and the communication as your plant, flower, or vegetable.

If you want a beautiful relationship like your garden, then you’re going to work on getting rid of destructive communication which is like your weeds in your garden for your communication to grow in a constructive way so that you can continue to have a beautiful relationship with your partner.

You and your partner are inspired and inspire each other to grow your beautiful relationship together by cultivating your communication by removing the weeds of destructive communication so that you can maintain healthy constructive communication no matter the topic of conversation.

 

 

Yes, you’re going to need to work on and continue to work on your communication for you to have a happy and harmonious relationship. It’s just like your garden.

It’s about doing your best to inspire and cultivate constructive communication so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship in your personal communication.

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re inspired, and you’ve inspired your partner to have constructive communication that supports a happy and harmonious relationship.

There are times that you might still have disagreements, and you and your partner know how to handle it so that it doesn’t lead to destructive communication.

If you managed to inspire communication that you were able to continue to have constructive communication… That’s a win!

If you still have destructive communication at times, and you’re unable to figure out how to change the communication pattern during the heat of your communication, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be:

  • What can you do differently so that you can create more constructive communication?
  • Why do you think and feel that destructive communication is occurring in the first place?
  • What can you do better next time?
  • What worked that you could continue to use?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of who you want to portray and have a good balance of holding yourself accountable when it comes to inspiring yourself to cultivate communication in your personal relationship.

This is the Communication Warrior.

 

You know your way of inspiration… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

GraceSOULutions Featured In Economic Insider

I’m absolutely thrilled to have been featured in Economic Insider!

Here is a brief excerpt from the article:

In today’s fast-paced world, where communication has become more digital and impersonal, it’s easy to feel like nobody is listening. Misunderstandings and conflicts can arise due to poor communication skills, leading to strained relationships and even breakups. However, Grace CW Liu, the founder of GraceSOULutions, believes that healthy communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship.

Grace is a communication expert who understands that the words we use carry power and energy, but communication is more than just words. It’s also about body language and listening skills. According to Grace, effective communication is all about give and take. It’s about understanding and being understood. Grace’s philosophy is that there is a solution to every problem, and when those problems involve communication and conversation, you need grace.

You can read the full article here:

Read The Full Article

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Nurture Feelings)

During your ‘communication game’ has this ever happened to you?

You’re having a nice communication and then all of the sudden the mood suddenly changes?

The mood has changed because either another person joined the group, or something was said which totally changed the whole mood of the conversation.

If you resonate as being a sensitive, introverted, and a conflict-phobic person, then you’re likely able to sense the change in the mood of a person or the whole mood of a conversation.

However, the person you’re speaking with might not have that ‘special skill’ of sensing the change of the mood or the conversation.

Your communication partner may not even realize that the mood of the conversation had changed at all. They might continue to be oblivious as to what is going on until someone it blows off and walks out of the conversation altogether.

Some people don’t have what I call the ‘Spidey Senses’ of sensing when the mood of a person or conversation is turning from calm into stormy weather.

If there is sudden mood change in the person or of the conversation, you as a sensitive, introverted, and conflict-phobic person might feel that it was your fault that it changed or you might even be dumbstruck yourself as to what happened and why things changed in such a way.

The thing is… You can sense the change.

One minute you’re having a nice joyful, peaceful conversation, then something was said, and now someone is pissed off and the best way to describe it is that you’re heading into a horrible storm.

In the communication game, it’s important to be aware and keep track of the various feelings and moods within the conversation.

If the person you’re speaking with doesn’t have the ‘Spidey Senses’ to sense the change in the mood, then you can give some warnings like a weather reporter who gives warnings when bad storms are coming.

You can say something to the person who is oblivious to the mood change something like, “let’s change the subject”, or “let’s table this discussion for now and discuss it at a later time”, or “I didn’t like the last comment you just said so let’s take a break”.

It doesn’t matter if you have Spidey Senses or not. All it takes is everyone paying attention to the people they’re speaking with.

There are hints, they might be subtle hints, that someone is getting upset during the conversation, and to quit while you’re ahead so that you don’t have to enter into the storm cloud. And sometimes they can leave people thinking “if only you had paid attention…”

The subtle hints or warnings might’ve been a change in facial expression, body language, tone of voice, or even a direct comment to stop that was ignored.

Think about it…

 

The subtle changes could’ve been anything from a large smile to a small weak smile, open arm movements to folded arms across the stomach, or a change in tone of voice from friendly to a more serious tone that gives the vibe of “don’t push my buttons.“

There are some people that have a natural gift of nurturing feelings in conversation while others may learn the necessary skills to develop nurture feelings during conversation.

Sadly, there are others who might not care to nurture any feelings in conversations. These are the people who don’t care if they pissed people off by what they said.

The type of people who don’t care about nurturing feelings in conversation are the ones who only care about what they wanted to say in the first place and say it in exactly the way that they wanted to say it.

Those who do nurture feelings in conversation or pay attention to it are usually the sensitive type. The ones who can sense the room or the person’s feelings because the people who nurture feelings might feel they are responsible for everyone’s feelings during the conversation.

A nice balance when it comes to nurturing feelings in a conversation is to be aware of the other person’s feelings, but also to realize that you are not fully responsible for the other person’s feelings.

You might’ve said something that was picked up wrong, you apologized for the mistake, and if the other person continues to be upset, well it’s on that person, and not on you.

You did your best to remedy the situation by apologizing and held yourself accountable for the mistake made and you just need to let the person work through their emotions, and you don’t need to beat yourself up about it or hold on to the responsibility.

 

The truth is that the mood of the person or change of mood during a conversation can happen at any time.

It’s about doing your best to nurture feelings so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship in your personal communication.

 

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re aware of nurturing feelings in your communication.

There are times that you might be able to sense the change in a person’s mood or the conversation and there are times you might miss it.

If you’ve managed to nurture feelings in your communication so that you were able to continue to have constructive communication… That’s a win!

If your communication changed because the person’s mood changed or the conversation changed from calm to stormy weather because you missed the changes that were happening during your communication, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be:

  • What can you do differently so that you can nurture feelings in your communication?
  • Why do you think you missed the changes that were occurring in the first place?
  • What can you do better next time?
  • What worked that you could continue to use?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into the authenticity of who you want to portray and have a good balance of holding yourself accountable when it comes to nurturing feelings in your communication.

This is the Communication Warrior.

 

You know your way to nurture feelings… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Book Your Session

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

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