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GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Active Listening]

[In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.]

In the nineth component of COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, we’re going to explore Active Listening.

If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that main characters have situations where listening becomes important. Main characters may have to listen to themselves or others along the way as they go through their journey.

Encountering different people and situations isn’t always easy and so for you, as the main character, you will undoubtedly encounter a person or situation where listening (and we’re talking about active listening) becomes important.

That is just part of being human and the overall human experience.

What do you do when you come across a situation where a person might say to you, “You’re not listening” or “You didn’t listen to what I said”?

Practice Active Listening              

Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…

Active Listening - I heard you say...

Magic phrase:
Repeat back everything the person says by saying “I heard you say ______ (list everything that the person said in his or her own words).

Make sure you have the person’s attention by calling the person’s name and make eye contact so that you know, both you and the other person are ready to listen to what you or they have to share.

As a main character in your story, when you choose to practice active listening, this will lead you to your happily ever after.

 

If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Complaints]

[In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.] 

In the eighth part of COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, we’re going to explore Complaints.

If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters can encounter people or situations to complain about or the people, go to the main characters to complain about a person or situation as they go through their journey.

Encountering different people and situations isn’t always easy and so for you, as the main character you will undoubtedly encounter a person or situation that you want to complain about, or a person or group of people come to you constantly to complain about someone or something.

That is just part of being human and having human experiences.

What do you do when you come across a situation where you’re constantly complaining, or people constantly come to you to complain about someone or something?

Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…

August - Feature - Complaints - I feel frustrated about...

 

Magic phrase (if you’re the complainer):

I feel frustrated or disappointed with or about _______
(state the person or situation that is frustrating you)

What are some things I can do to improve the situation?
(make a list of what you can do to make it better such as changing your attitude, limiting contact with person, ignore the other person’s behaviors, offer suggestions to improve situation if appropriate, and so forth.)

Magic phrase (if person or people come to complain to you):

I hear your frustration about_____
(repeat back the person’s list of complaints).

What do you think you can do to improve the situation or situation with the person?
(This allows the person to think about what he or she can do to allow him or her feel empowered rather than disempowered and so he or she start to think about finding solutions to his or her own problems rather than coming to you with complaints all the time.)

You acknowledge the feeling of your own frustrations, and you also think about ways to come up with solutions to problems so that you find less things to complain about.

Complaining doesn’t help you to find solutions, it just makes you wallow in your suffering.

Solutions help to end your suffering.

When someone complains to you to constantly complain about someone or situation you show that you’re listening to that person by listing all of the person’s complaints; however, you’re going to empower the person to come up with his or her own solutions by allowing him or her think about the changes he or she can make.

As a main character in your story, you can choose to wallow in your complaints and/or listen to other people’s complaints or you can choose to empower yourself and others by finding solutions that will solve your problems to eliminate the need to complain, and this will lead you to your happily ever after.

If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Importance of I]

[In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.]

In the seventh component of COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, we’re going to explore is the Importance of “I.”

If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that main characters, protagonists, can sometimes give their power away to support characters, or companions by using words like “you.” This can take the form of statements such as ‘you chose to go this way’ or ‘you made me do this’ or even ‘we wouldn’t be in this position if you had or hadn’t done […]’ as they go through their journey.

In those instances, the protagonist gave away their power when they used the word ‘you’ and at that point they stated specifically that the companion did something directly to the main characters which isn’t entirely true.

That is just part of being human and having human experiences.

What can you do to bring back the power to you?

First you have to understand that when you make comments such as “you made me feel…” or “you could have…” you gave your power away to the other person by telling the person he or she did something to you.

No matter what the other person did or didn’t do, the truth is that you have control over your feelings, thoughts, emotions, behaviors, etc.

Bring your power back to you by using “I” Statements.

Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…

July - Feature - Importance - The importance of i statements

Magic phrases you can use are:

I am_______.                      

I feel_______.

I know_______.

I think _______.

 

When you use “I” statements you’re reclaiming control of what you’re feel, think, or believe about what happened.

There is no blame, and no blame on the other person. You’re clearly stating what you’re feeling and wanting so you now have your power back.

As a main character in your story, you can choose to give your power away or reclaim and stand in your power with I statements to your happily ever after.

If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Not Funny]

[In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.]

In the COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, the sixth component we’re going to explore is Not Funny.

If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters can encounter some people who try to add humor to help lighten the mood or help bleak situations (comic relief characters). Sometimes the main characters are the ones who do their best to add humor to the situations as they go through their journey.

Encountering different people and situations isn’t always easy and so you, as the main character, will undoubtedly have situations where it might be you or someone else who wants to lighten up the mood, but does so in the wrong way with an inappropriate comment or poor timing.

That is just part of the human experience.

What do you do when the attempt to lighten up the mood goes all wrong?

You know the attempt to lighten up the mood or situation goes wrong when someone says something like, “That’s not funny” or “Oh, you think this is funny? Because I don’t.”

Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…

 

June - Feature - Not Funny - That joke fell flat

Magic phrase: That joke fell flat.

It’s that simple. When someone says something that is not funny or tries to be funny, but the joke didn’t work on you because, let’s say, it felt like the person was picking on you in a mean way. Then at that point you can simply say, “that joke fell flat.”

You’re not directing the phrase at the person, rather you’re directing it at the joke not being funny and it not working for you and therefore you’re not going to give a reaction.

If the person asks you why it isn’t funny or makes comments such as “you’re being too sensitive” or “you can’t take a joke,” simply repeat the phrase “that joke fell flat” and leave it at that.

As a main character in your story, you can choose what is funny or not to you and whether what was said was a joke or an insult.

You can choose to fight back with an insult of your own or instead you can use the magic phrase when something was said was not funny.

That will lead you toward your happily ever after.

If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com