Find Your Unique Communication Style

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Opinion]

In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.

In the COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, the next component that we’re going to explore is Opinion

If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters are given different opinions or advice that change depending upon the perspectives of different people as to what the main characters should do to overcome the obstacles that are faced during their journey.

So, what opinions or advice are you given? And do you feel obligated to listen or follow the differing opinions that are shared with you?

What do you do in situations when people say something that is viewed as an opinion or advice that you don’t agree with?

What can you say to those people who are clearly stating an opinion or offering advice, but are treating it as fact which you simply don’t agree with?

Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…

Thank you for sharing your opinion

 

Magic phrase: Thank you for sharing your opinion or advice.

Everyone is free to have their opinion and share his or her advice and you can certainly choose to agree or disagree.

By thanking the person you’re certainly not stating that you agree or disagree, you are showing you have good manners and appreciation by thanking the person for taking the time to share that opinion or advice with you.

Who knows if the opinion or advice could have been helpful or not. That’s up to you to choose whether you want to listen and believe and follow the person’s opinion, after all you’re the main character in your story.

As a main character, you get to choose your path and the opinions you want to believe, listen to, and follow that will lead you to your happily ever after.

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Challenge]

In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.

To begin the COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After we’re going to start with the first component: Challenge.

If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters in the stories all face challenges of some sort, whether it be to slay dragons, complete an impossible mission, or conquer some fear that must be faced and overcome.

So, what challenges are you facing?

How do you deal with challenges, especially the ones that come from your thoughts or the words you’re thinking and saying?

What about the people who challenge you by the way they speak to you in your conversations?

What can you do to overcome these challenges?

Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…

Is this thought or statement creating the future I want?

Magic phrase: Is this thought or statement creating the future I want?

A lot of times when you’re faced with a challenge you think you can’t conquer because you believe that you can’t or someone says you can’t.

However, is it the thought or statement creating the future that you want?

If not, then change the thought or statement that would create the future that you do want.

You can choose to either continue to think and say or allow others to say things that will make you stuck in a challenge or situation or you can choose to change your thoughts and statements to create the future you want.

If the other person is saying things that is not the future you want to create or what you want for the both of you, then you can say “Is this statement you’re saying what you want to create for me or for us for the future?”

Your thoughts and statements that you’re creating for your future lead you to your happily ever after.

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Prologue]

Prologue: The Evolution of COMMUNICATES

The COMMUNICATES series started…

In 2021, the concept of COMMUNICATES was introduced and was a prelude of what was to come. I incorporated one of my favorite past times hula hooping and used my hula hoops to introduce my idea of COMMUNICATES.

In 2022, the foundation of COMMUNICATES was laid out through the demonstration of the meaning of the word ‘COMMUNICATES’ from an energetic level by show casing the different components of COMMUNICATES. Each of the letters represented a component in the word “COMMUNICATES’ and so the word COMMUNICATES as a whole embodied each of those components.

In 2023, The focus was about implementing COMMUNICATES in your communication with one person or many others. COMMUNICATES Game was introduced to help implement ‘COMMUNICATES’ in a fun way rather than something daunting, especially when communicating with a difficult person or in a situation. If you were stuck with your communication, then treat it as a game to help you to lighten up and break through difficult communication situations.

Which leads to 2024, COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After.
I love happy endings and stories that end with ‘they lived happily ever after’.
I believe that everyone can live a happily ever after, whatever it may look like for that person.
There is a quote, “Life is short to be anything, but happy” and I truly believe that.
My mission is to help as many people as I can to live happily ever after and one of the ways to do that is through communication.
Communication is the key to unlocking relationships and to keep the door of relationships open you need to have good communication.

In 2024, the focus is on how COMMUNICATES can give you, your happily ever after. COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After introduces magical phrases that you can use when you encounter some of the situations in your daily life in your communication.
You are the main character in your story, so you get to choose whether you want to use the magical phrases that I suggested or not.
You’re free to choose to use someone else’s phrase that you might’ve heard, the phrases I suggest, or perhaps one that you come up with on your own that resonates and aligns more with your personality and who you are for that communication situation.
The important thing to remember is to communicate from your heart and intuition.
As long as you’re communicating from your heart and intuition you can’t go wrong and this will lead you to your happily ever after.

If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Styles)

Everyone has their own clothing and fashion style. This fashion style makes the person feel good and they are comfortable with it. The same can be said for communication style.

Likewise, everyone has their own communication style that they are is comfortable with. And in that vein, there is no right or wrong fashion style, or communication style, because these are personal choices.

There are a lot of different fashion and fashion trends and styles out there. There are some basic fashion items that make sense for people to have in their closet such as a black dress for women, a black or blue suit for men, a nice blouse, jeans, blazer, and nice casual dress shoes.

Four basic communication styles that you should know about to establish and cultivate rapport in your communication are:

auditory (hear, listen),
visual (see, picture),
kinesthetic (feel, touch),
auditory digital (think, analyze).

In fashion, beyond the basic clothing items, you have some people who go forward with trends or who follow other people’s fashion beyond the basic clothing fundamentals.

Why? Because in some cases they’ve been told that more is better and that you can be more creative when you have more.

Perhaps they’ve also been told that some of their fashion items made them look old or “old-fashioned.”

Rather than wearing what they wanted they followed the trend which made them feel more like someone else and not themselves.

After a while they’ve become someone else, someone they no longer recognize, and perhaps wished they could be themselves and have a desire to wear clothes that represent more of themselves.

Honestly, it’s not necessary to have more than the basic clothing that is needed to go out and do your daily activities.

It’s just nice to have additional clothing in your closet to some flair and fun.

Communication can be the same way.

You might have a way within your own style of communication, however, you’ve been told you can’t communicate this or that way.

You’ve learned to adopt a certain way to communicate that fits more with the “norm” of what is expected in society when communicating in that situation.

You might feel like you’re wearing a mask rather than being your authentic self.

For example, when at a social gathering with friends in a restaurant or at an event, it’s expected that people are smiling, having polite conversations, nice, pleasant small talks, and speaking for the most part at an appropriate volume.

What if you’re an introvert at a social gathering with your friends?

Does all the smiling and small talk made you feel like you’re wearing a mask?

Behind the mask of smiling and participating and engaging in the small talk leaves you feeling drained and as though you’re ready to leave. However, you can’t leave in this case because you’ve only been at the gathering for 10 minutes! All you want to do is find a corner and hide so that you can finally stop smiling and have some quiet time to yourself to recharge so that you don’t drain your battery with all the small talk. You might decide this is a good time to go to the bathroom so you can hide in one of the stalls for a while. Nope, you talked to people along the way into the bathroom, by the sink in the bathroom, along the way back to the main room, and again in the main room. You might’ve had a good three minutes to yourself which is not enough time for an introvert. Plus, you know that no one really cared about what you thought about the weather in the first place.

Do you wish you could just take off your mask and say, “you know, my face is getting really tired from all this smiling, and I know you’re being polite, and you really don’t care what I think about xyz… I really am interested to know how you’re feeling that’s why I asked, but you’re just asking me out of politeness.”

Not all introverts may feel the way I just described since not all introverts are the same.

There might be some similarities, but still, each has his or her own individual style.

Extroverts and ambiverts will have their similarities, and each will have their own communication style as an extrovert and ambivert.

It’s about finding your own style, being comfortable with your style, and finding a way to communicate with your style.

The example I gave about the introvert, wearing the mask, and the feeling behind the mask, you guessed it: It was me.

I no longer wear my mask. I tell people upfront, I’m an introvert which means I need some down time to recharge my battery. I smile and make small talk, and I also let people know that as much as I like talking to them, it’s time for me to recharge my energy because that’s what this introvert needs to do.

By making it lighthearted and fun, the person knows that it’s about my energy and not about them.

Once I embraced and understood what it meant to be an introvert for me, then I could communicate using my humorous communication style to communicate to other people it’s time for me to recharge without having to pretend or wear a mask of consistently smiling and engaging in small talk that drained my energy.

As an introvert, I like to use humorous communication style to get by.

You might be an introvert, but your style might be practical, or avoidance.

There are many communication styles and again it can be different for each of the introverts, extroverts, and ambiverts.

It’s easy to know, understand, and recognize the basic communication styles that I mentioned earlier in this blog so that is where I recommend starting first.

If you know and understand your own basic communication style, then you can start to recognize your partner’s basic communication style to continue cultivating rapport in your communication with your partner so that you have a happy and harmonious relationship.

The other communication styles are good to know, might help you to become creative with your communication, but it’s not completely necessary to help you to cultivate a rapport in your communication with your partner.

 

There are many different communication styles, and start with recognizing, understanding, and knowing the four basic communication styles.

It’s about using the communication style that will support and cultivate rapport with your communication partner so that you can continue to have a happy and harmonious personal relationship with your partner.

There might be similarities between introverts, extroverts, and ambiverts; however, each introvert, extrovert, and ambivert has his or her own unique communication style.


The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re aware of the four basic communication styles and that there are similarities between introverts, extrovert, and ambiverts; however, each introvert, extrovert, and ambivert has his or her own unique communication style.

There are many communication styles; however, knowing the four basic communication styles is a good start to establish and cultivate rapport with your communication partner.

If you used the communication style that supported you and your partner to establish and cultivate rapport in your communication so that you and your partner felt seen and heard… That’s a win!

If you didn’t use the communication style or know which communication style to use that would have better supported or cultivated rapport with your partner, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be:

  • What can you do differently next time to establish or cultivate rapport?
  • What patterns of words do you notice that you use, and your partner uses that would best represent one of the four basic communication styles?
  • What can you do better next time?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of the character you want to portray and hold yourself accountable with using the communication style that would establish and cultivate rapport with your partner in your communication.

This is the Communication Warrior.

You know your way around the four basic communication styles… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a Communication Warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping your from becoming a Communication Warrior.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Express Yourself | The COMMUNICATES Game

If you’re an introvert, sensitive, people pleaser, who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms, stay tuned for fun and valuable information.

Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the Communicates Warrior Game video series, or what I like to call COMMUNICATES Game.

Now, if you have missed the other videos in this video series, that’s okay, stay here for now, you can always catch up with those other videos later on. So in this video, today, we’re going to talk about expressing yourself. There are many ways you can express yourself. Certainly one of the ways is through words, right verbal communication. So the words, the tone of voice, the body language, the facial expressions, the hand gestures. But of course, you can also communicate in written format, right, in writing. And you can also communicate and express yourself through art, right, just even painting, sculpting, drawing, or music, dancing. So you can see there’s other ways to communicate and express yourself, not necessarily all the time with verbal communication. But of course, in this video series, the main focus has been on verbal communication.

But today we’re going to be talking about expressing your self, and we’re going to use the communication characters, in talking about how each of the characters might express him or herself. So let’s get started.

All right, so our first communication character is Stance our confident communicator. All right, so their’s Stance. Now Stance because Stance’s is a confident person, we would expect that Stance is going to express him or herself with confidence. And what might that look like? Well Stance is going to be able to do things and do things well. That will be you know, communicating verbally written some performance of some sort, either through art, music, whatever it is, Stance is going to do it with confidence, you know, shoulders back, back, straight smile on the face, if it’s appropriate. And if Stance happens to make a misstep Stance is going to be able to pivot quickly. And you know, do it with confidence. But in most cases, you might not even have known that Stance made an error because they just know how to carry on. Right. So it almost feels like when Stance is expressing him or herself, they know exactly what to do to avoid any missteps. It’s almost like you don’t really see any missteps at all. And if it does happen, you don’t even realize it. Why? Because they just have that confidence, like you know what, I can carry on no matter what, however, they express themselves. They just know what to do. And they’re not afraid if something goes wrong, because they have the confidence to know how to pivot and perhaps even how to repair it, maybe even a way that you didn’t even know that they had made a mistake in the first place. All right, so that is Stance.

Okay, and our next communication character is Brash. Now Brash is our arrogant communicator. So how is Brash going to express him or herself? Well, we expect that Brash is going to take up space, right? So we suspect that Brash is going to express him or herself in a big way, perhaps, you know, using big movements, or over the top way of, you know, expressing him or herself either through music, the clothing they wear, or art, whatever it is, they’re gonna make a big splash, right? Because they just want to shine. That’s how Brash just might be right? Because, again, Brash wants to shine. So have a way to, you know, make sure that Brash is standing out. So big movements, big splashes, you know, it could be in clothing, it could be in the way they carry themselves with their tone of voice or their volume. involve their voice or even their body language and even in their performance, right? If they’re underperforming, perhaps you know through their art, music, whatever it might be, that might be how Brash express him or herself, because again, they like to shine, and they want– and they like to stand out.

Okay, so our next communication character is Gray, and Gray is our timid communicator. So as you can see, Gray is wanting to kind of blend in, right. So when Gray communicates or express him or herself is probably going to be more in a gentle, quiet way. Right, you might find that Gray might prefer to draw or paint or do something to express him or herself. Maybe it’s dance, and it might be some gentle dances, or it might be, you know, any type of dance. However, again, it’s being with the other crowds, right with other people. And if Gray does perform or express him or herself, there’s nobody else around Gray might do it in a very quiet, subtle way of expressing him or herself. Gray might be also a type of person that prefers writing, rather than verbal. Might prefer, you know, sometimes to express him or herself through the art, right, because it’s all very just inward, and away from other people. Again, Gray, may just prefer to express him or herself through quiet needs, writing, painting, drawing, you know, that type of thing. So, that’s Gray.

And then of course, we have Blend our Shapeshifter communicator. And so Blend, of course, is going to be able to read the room, read the situation, figure out what would be best in expressing him or herself in that situation. So Blend, being the shapeshifter kind of is able to like say, okay, you know, this is more of a quiet mood. So express him or herself in more in a quiet way. Perhaps if you know, Blend is more in a kind of party situation, right? Then Blend is going to be able to express him or herself more in that party mood type of situation. If it calls for that confidence Blend can also be that confidence again, Blend is that type of person, you know, that is able to kind of see what’s going on and almost feel very comfortable and kind of going in this direction or in that direction, right, because again, Blend is our shapeshifter. So for Blend, it’s going to be very easy for Blend to decide, you know how he or she is going to express him or herself, depending upon the situation. And you know, the person they– that they are with, they feel very comfortable and almost playing all different parts at the same time. Because they just have that ability to like shapeshift, right. So Blend can just express him or herself accordingly to whichever situation or group that he or she is in. So it might be if it’s requires to be quiet, they’re okay with that if it requires them to be kind of loud, they’re also okay with that. And if they requires them to be, you know, more confidence and just kind of being able to go with it. They’re okay with that too. Right. So that is Blend our Shapeshifter communicator.

And this is you as the Communication Warrior, where you are standing up nice and tall and you’re able to communicate all of your thoughts, feelings and desires, and you’re able to express yourself the way you want to express yourself. So if you want to express yourself with confidence, you’re able to do that. If you want to express yourself in a way that makes you look like you’re shining and you’re standing out. You can do that. If you want to communicate in a way that you just want to have some quietness, where you just want to draw or paint or something to express yourself through art form. You can do that. You know how to express yourself in your own way that is authentic to you. Because you are the Communication Warrior.

And if you don’t feel like you’re a Communication Warrior yet, that’s okay. Because I’m going to invite you to book a free communication breakthrough session with me by visiting my website GraceSOULutions.com That’s GraceSOULutions.com where we will discover five obstacles that is stopping you. And one thing that you can do to help you to move forward so that you can start to be confident in communicating your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms, so that you can have that happy and harmonious relationship with your partner through communication. And the next video, we’re going to be talking about communication styles. So I’ll see you here next time for that.

And in the meantime, go have fun communicating!

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Express Yourself)

There are many different ways that you can communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires.

One of the ways is through body language and facial expression (which I wrote about in one of my previous blog posts). The majority of the blog articles I have written have had to do with verbal expression in communication. This mainly refers to spoken words and tone of voice.

For some of you, you might find it easier to express yourself through written expression or perhaps through artistic expression. You might find that it’s easier for you to gain more clarity of what you’re thinking, feeling, and wanting through drawing, painting, dancing, playing or listening to music, or journaling.

You also might find that before you verbally express your thoughts, feelings, or desires to your partner that you first need to process and gain clarity on what exactly it is that you’re thinking, feeling, and wanting.

Using some of the modalities (again, such as drawing, dancing, journaling) might help you to process what you’re feeling and help you figure out on the best way to communicate your feelings and what it is you really want from your partner.

Sometimes you might not be able to put it down into words or find the right way to describe or communicate what it is you want to express. This is when artistic expression may come in handy. This could be things such as: drawing an abstract picture of what you’re feeling, dancing to the mood of the music you’re feeling drawn to, or just writing any words that comes to your mind into a notebook journal.

First you need to have clarity on what it is your thinking, feeling, and wanting. Then you can better communicate that to your partner.

If you’re feeling confused and muddled as to your own thoughts, feelings, and desires and you can’t even communicate them clearly to yourself, then how you’re going to communicate clearly to your partner so that they can understand you?

Artistic expression can help you to process and understand yourself first so that you know what it is that you want to communicate to your partner so that you can get the support you want from them.

When you can openly, honestly, and clearly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires to your partner then you will feel supported and that will nurture a happy and harmonious relationship.

It’s also up to you if you would rather directly show your artistic expression to your partner as a way to communicate to them. Artistic expression can be incredibly personalized so it’s entirely up to you what and how you choose to share.

For some of you, you might find it easier to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires through a written expression such as writing a letter.

You might choose to write a letter to your partner to tell him or her what you’re deeply thinking, feeling, and wanting because you might find it easier to communicate it this way instead of outright saying it.

You might be asking “is there a tone of voice through written expression? Is it just as effective as when speaking out loud?” The answer is yes to both.

There is a tone of voice in written expression through the words and sentences you put into the letter, the pressure of your writing the individual characters and how you craft the sentences, and where you choose to place emphasis in your letter. Writing a letter to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires can end up being just as effective as verbal communication.

Perhaps in some situations you might find it easier to openly and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires in the letter format or through any number of written expression formats rather than straight verbal expression because you’re afraid to see your partner’s reaction.

Sometimes by allowing time to process the information (such as reading a letter), and then discussing it afterwards when everyone has had time to process their own feelings may make it easier to have constructive conversation about what was written to discuss it further.

There are so many different ways to communicate. It’s ultimately about you choosing the modality to express yourself (whether that be through verbal, written or artistic) so that you can openly and honestly communicate using what you have chosen in order to clearly communicate with your partner.

Sometimes you may choose to use just one or a combination of artistic expression methods to help you to gain clarity on your own thoughts, feelings, and desires so that you know exactly what it is you want to communicate.

Your goal is to have it so your partner could clearly hear and understand what it was you communicated to him or her because you were clear about your own thoughts, feelings, and desires.

 


 

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re able to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires clearly, openly, and honestly.

There are times that you might not feel you’re able to clearly, openly, and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires through verbal expression.

You might instead be able to clearly, openly, and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires through other means of communication such as written or artistic expression.

If you managed to clearly, openly, and honestly communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires using verbal, written, or artistic expression to communicate with your partner without fear of argument or criticism…That’s a win!

If you couldn’t clearly, openly and honestly communicate with your partner with using any of the communication modalities, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be:

  • What can you do differently next time or what communication modality can you use next time so that you can communicate more clearly, openly, and honestly?
  • Why do you think you held yourself back from being able to communicate more clearly, openly, and honestly?
  • What can you do better next time?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of the character you want to portray and hold yourself accountable when expressing yourself.

This is the Communication Warrior.

You know your way to express yourself… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a Communication Warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping your from becoming a Communication Warrior.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

Tone of Voice | The COMMUNICATES Game

If you’re an introvert, sensitive, people pleaser, who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms: Stay tuned for fun and valuable information.

Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the COMMUNICATES game video series, or what I like to call the COMMUNICATES game. Now, if you have missed the previous videos in this series, don’t worry, stay here for now, you can always catch up with the previous videos that I have recorded in this video series later on. So today in this video, we’re going to be talking about Tone of Voice.

Tone of Voice

Now, you know how sometimes somebody’s tone of voice can either uplift you or annoy you, or even perhaps trigger you. So sometimes one person’s voice may be uplifting to one person, but that same tone of voice can either be triggering or annoying to another person. So a tone of voice can almost be subjective, it’s almost depending on how the person perceives that voice or the tone of voice. So somebody who might have a sarcastic personality might have a sarcastic tone of voice. And for one person, they will be okay with that. And then to another person, it might be very triggering. It’s all about the perception. And based on your experiences, and how you’re feeling that day, that tone of voice can either be okay. Or it could be “what the heck.” So we’re going to use the communication characters to talk about the tone of voice. Now, I like to preface that the character that we’re going through, I’m only going to generalized, what the tone of voice might be for the communication characters. So for example, Stance is our confident communicator, and we suspect that Stance will have a certain tone of voice. But it doesn’t mean that Stance can’t have a sarcastic tone of voice. Stance can easily also be a soft spoken, gentle person that has a very gentle soft spoken tone of voice neutral Stance can also show an aggressive tone of voice, it doesn’t matter, there’s all these characters can have all the tone of voices out there. But generally, when we associate a person like who is confident, generally we suspect that that person will have a particular tone of voice. So I’m going to be just talking about a general sense of what tone of voice that the characters may have. So having said that, let’s get started.

Stance – The Confident Communicator

So again, our first character is Stance and Stance is our confident communicator. Alright, so here is Stance. Now Stance, who is our confident communicator, obviously, we’re going to expect that Stance is going to have a confident tone of voice. So what does that mean? Well, most likely Stance is going to have perhaps more of that assertive tone of voice, maybe that no-nonsense Stance could also have that uplifting tone of voice, not like a high pitch or anything like that. But just an uplifting spirit of such that kind of like, makes you feel like “yes, I can do it” right? In a very assertive, no-nonsense kind of way but still very up lifting, that is kind of the tone of voice that we would expect that most of the confident communicators would have. Again, just because Stance is confident and you know, we in generalizing that they would have that sort of tone of voice Stance can easily still have, like I mentioned earlier, a sarcastic tone of voice an aggressive tone of voice, a soft spoken tone of voice anything it’s just, again, Stance is just going to use the tone of voice but it’s going to show that confidence that no-nonsense. Alright. So our next communicator is Brash and Brash is our arrogant communicator.

Brash – The Arrogant Communicator

So this is Brash, our arrogant communicator. And so because Brash has that “out there” type of person banality like likes to shine and be there. And so we might suspect that Brash, his tone of voice, might come off as aggressive and Brash might also have a sarcastic personality. So perhaps might even have a sarcastic tone of voice, just because it depends on the situation. So, you know, again, if Brash is wanting to show like, “Yes, I can, you know, I’m best in this,” or what have, you might show more of that aggression, that more aggressive tone of voice. Brash, can easily have more of a, you know, down to earth tone of voice as well, we just don’t know. Right? You know, it depends on the situation. However, because of the big personality, we, as we suspect that most in most cases, in a general sense, that Brash is going to have that more aggressive, that big personality, type of tone of voice.

Gray – The Timid Communicator

And then we have Gray, our timid communicator. So as you can see, in the picture, Gray is very much wanting to be in a background, right, because you can see the posture and everything. So Gray probably would like to hide, be kind of like blending into the background, hang in the back. So what is the tone of voice that would kind of not draw attention to Gray? That would probably be like this soft and gentle tone of voice, right? Because if you think about like water, you know, being very gentle kind of going with the flow, you can kind of feel like Gray is going to be that type of like, “I don’t want to bring attention to myself.” So Gray is most likely going to have that tone of voice, that will likely not draw attention to him or herself. Having said that, the tone of voice that would likely not draw attention would be that soft and gentle tone of voice. However, that doesn’t mean that Gray can’t be assertive, or have that, you know, uplifting tone of voice and what have you. Certainly Gray can still have that, but perhaps it’s not as big, right? It can perhaps be toned down a bit, even though Gray might have that assertiveness– to it the tone of voice of assertiveness to it, but also might be toned down a little bit. So there’s a bit of softness to it or gentleness to it as well. So again, we’re just generalizing, but certainly in some situations, where Gray might be really comfortable, who knows. Gray might then all of a sudden become that really big, uplifting, you know, person with a big tone of– with a loud tone of voice Who knows, right? Depending on situations but in general, we suspect that Gray will have more of that gentle, a lower tone of voice and and softer tone of voice. Okay, and then we have Blend.

Blend – The Shapeshifter Communicator

Blend is our Shapeshifter communicator. So even though Blend is able to read the room and situations, you know, Blend is going to choose the tone of voice that most likely will best fit the person or in that situation. However, it doesn’t mean that Blend is always going to perhaps choose the right tone of voice to use. Remember, everybody has their own perceptions and some tone of voice can be uplifting to one person, it can be triggering to another person, that same tone of voice that can be uplifting to one can also be triggering for another. However, Blend is most likely also going to be able to kind of figure out which tone of voice might be better for that room or for that situations. But if Blend happens to use the wrong tone of voice Blend might be able to quickly switch and figure out which one will be next best just to kind of make sure that the conversations carry on.

You – The Communication Warrior

And this is what we want for You: You as the Communication Warrior. So this is you as the communication warrior, where you are open and confident in communicating your thoughts feelings and desires with using the right tone of voice that fit with the person and the situation that you are in. However, if you happen to choose the wrong tone of voice, you are the communication warrior. You know how to fix it you know how to shift to a different tone of waste that perhaps that will help you to carry on to have that conversation. Because after all, you no longer are afraid, like, Oops, you don’t know what to do. You’re the communication warrior. You didn’t get the right tone of voice, you know exactly what to do to make sure that it gets shifted in the right direction so that you can continue to have that productive conversation.

But if you don’t feel like you’re a communication warrior yet, that’s okay. I’m going to invite you to visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com. That’s GraceSOULutions.com to book a free Communication Breakthrough Session, where we will discover five challenges or obstacles that are standing in your way, and one action step that you can do that will help you to move forward. And in the next videos, we’re going to see how the communication characters deal with expressing themselves. So stay tuned for that.

And in the meantime, go have fun communicating!

Let’s Play COMMUNICATES (Tone of Voice)

Do certain noises or sounds make you happy while other noises or sounds can annoy you?

What do you feel when you hear an ice cream van? Happy or perhaps nostalgic.

What about a siren? Most likely annoyed by the loud sound of a siren.

Your tone of voice can be the same way.

Some tones of voice may make you feel happy and supported while other tones of voice may negatively trigger you.

Have you ever heard someone say to you, you better watch your tone of voice or don’t give me that tone of voice?

Or perhaps you have said those exact statements to your partner.

Why?

Because the tone of voice somehow triggered you.

Perhaps your partner said something to you in passing and because of his or her tone of voice, you picked it up wrong and say something like, what’s wrong with you, why you’re using that tone of voice with me?

Or what’s with that tone of voice you just used?

Your partner might not have meant anything by it, but because of his or her tone of voice, it just set something off in you like a firecracker or vice versa.

Tone of voice can be subjective, and the tone might sound one way to one person it can sound completely different to another person.

For example, a happy uplifting tone can sound like you’re being cheered on by one person where to another person it might sound as if he or she is being mocked.

Mocked for not being able to do something, the uplifting tone is just to rubbing it in that he or she can’t do it, and it’s a fake cheer rather than an actual genuine cheer or support.

To the person who feels he or she is being mocked the person with the happy and uplifting tone is actually being sincere; however, his or her tone of voice is picked up wrong by the person feeling mocked.

Some people are sensitive to the tone of voice.

He or she is sensitive to how the tone of voice sounds because he or she is sensing the person’s mood and the true feeling behind the statement that delivered.

Some people are not bothered by an aggressive tone or sarcastic tone, and others can be.

If you’re a sensitive, introverted, and conflict-phobic person, then some tone of voice may bother you or you may be more sensitive to some tones of voice than others such as you might be more sensitive and bothered by an aggressive tone versus calming tone.

For some people a calming tone may sound like the person is bored or don’t have any emotions.

Everyone might agree with what an aggressive tone may sound like, a happy tone, a sad tone, or calming tone, etc.

However, not everyone is going to agree that that’s the tone that the person used and not everyone is going to be comfortable or be accepting of a tone of voice that was used.

Knowing what tone of voice, you’re comfortable with and the ones that trigger you the wrong way will help you to communicate to your partner which tones of voice to use more often when communicating with you so that you feel supported by your partner rather than leaving you feeling lonely and misunderstood.

Also, knowing the tone of voice that you use that uplifts or triggers your partner will help you to use more of the tone of voice that uplifts rather than triggers your partner so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship.

 

Tone of voice is subjective. You might be okay with some tones of voice and other tones of voice might trigger you and the same can be said for your partner.

It’s about being aware of your tone of voice and knowing which tones of voice uplifts you and which one triggers you as well as knowing which one uplifts and triggers your partner.

Using the tone of voice that uplifts and supports you and your partner when communicating so that you and your partner both feel supported when communicating with each other for a better and deeper personal relationship.

The Objective of the Game

The ‘winning’ objective is that you’re aware that tone of voice can be subjective.

Knowing and using the tone of voice that uplifts you and your partner when communicating to form a better connection.

Avoid using the tone of voice that triggers you and your partner.

If you managed to use the tone of voice that uplifts you and your partner to form a closer connection…That’s a win!

If you and your partner sometimes used the tone of voice that triggered rather than uplifted each other in your communication, that’s okay. Guess what?

You learned without losing.

Remember there is no losing in this game, only learning.

Learning points in this example might be what can you do differently next time to use the tone of voice that will uplift or show support for your partner? Why do you think the tone of voice you used or your partner used triggered you or your partner? What can you do better next time?

You earn bonus points when you’re bold and step into your authenticity of the character you want to portray and hold yourself accountable with the tone of voice you used in your communication.

This is the Communication Warrior.

You know your way to your tone of voice… Now Go Play and Have Fun Communicating!

If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com