Express Yourself | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re an introvert, sensitive, people pleaser, who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms, stay tuned for fun and valuable information.
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the Communicates Warrior Game video series, or what I like to call COMMUNICATES Game.
Now, if you have missed the other videos in this video series, that’s okay, stay here for now, you can always catch up with those other videos later on. So in this video, today, we’re going to talk about expressing yourself. There are many ways you can express yourself. Certainly one of the ways is through words, right verbal communication. So the words, the tone of voice, the body language, the facial expressions, the hand gestures. But of course, you can also communicate in written format, right, in writing. And you can also communicate and express yourself through art, right, just even painting, sculpting, drawing, or music, dancing. So you can see there’s other ways to communicate and express yourself, not necessarily all the time with verbal communication. But of course, in this video series, the main focus has been on verbal communication.
But today we’re going to be talking about expressing your self, and we’re going to use the communication characters, in talking about how each of the characters might express him or herself. So let’s get started.
All right, so our first communication character is Stance our confident communicator. All right, so their’s Stance. Now Stance because Stance’s is a confident person, we would expect that Stance is going to express him or herself with confidence. And what might that look like? Well Stance is going to be able to do things and do things well. That will be you know, communicating verbally written some performance of some sort, either through art, music, whatever it is, Stance is going to do it with confidence, you know, shoulders back, back, straight smile on the face, if it’s appropriate. And if Stance happens to make a misstep Stance is going to be able to pivot quickly. And you know, do it with confidence. But in most cases, you might not even have known that Stance made an error because they just know how to carry on. Right. So it almost feels like when Stance is expressing him or herself, they know exactly what to do to avoid any missteps. It’s almost like you don’t really see any missteps at all. And if it does happen, you don’t even realize it. Why? Because they just have that confidence, like you know what, I can carry on no matter what, however, they express themselves. They just know what to do. And they’re not afraid if something goes wrong, because they have the confidence to know how to pivot and perhaps even how to repair it, maybe even a way that you didn’t even know that they had made a mistake in the first place. All right, so that is Stance.
Okay, and our next communication character is Brash. Now Brash is our arrogant communicator. So how is Brash going to express him or herself? Well, we expect that Brash is going to take up space, right? So we suspect that Brash is going to express him or herself in a big way, perhaps, you know, using big movements, or over the top way of, you know, expressing him or herself either through music, the clothing they wear, or art, whatever it is, they’re gonna make a big splash, right? Because they just want to shine. That’s how Brash just might be right? Because, again, Brash wants to shine. So have a way to, you know, make sure that Brash is standing out. So big movements, big splashes, you know, it could be in clothing, it could be in the way they carry themselves with their tone of voice or their volume. involve their voice or even their body language and even in their performance, right? If they’re underperforming, perhaps you know through their art, music, whatever it might be, that might be how Brash express him or herself, because again, they like to shine, and they want– and they like to stand out.
Okay, so our next communication character is Gray, and Gray is our timid communicator. So as you can see, Gray is wanting to kind of blend in, right. So when Gray communicates or express him or herself is probably going to be more in a gentle, quiet way. Right, you might find that Gray might prefer to draw or paint or do something to express him or herself. Maybe it’s dance, and it might be some gentle dances, or it might be, you know, any type of dance. However, again, it’s being with the other crowds, right with other people. And if Gray does perform or express him or herself, there’s nobody else around Gray might do it in a very quiet, subtle way of expressing him or herself. Gray might be also a type of person that prefers writing, rather than verbal. Might prefer, you know, sometimes to express him or herself through the art, right, because it’s all very just inward, and away from other people. Again, Gray, may just prefer to express him or herself through quiet needs, writing, painting, drawing, you know, that type of thing. So, that’s Gray.
And then of course, we have Blend our Shapeshifter communicator. And so Blend, of course, is going to be able to read the room, read the situation, figure out what would be best in expressing him or herself in that situation. So Blend, being the shapeshifter kind of is able to like say, okay, you know, this is more of a quiet mood. So express him or herself in more in a quiet way. Perhaps if you know, Blend is more in a kind of party situation, right? Then Blend is going to be able to express him or herself more in that party mood type of situation. If it calls for that confidence Blend can also be that confidence again, Blend is that type of person, you know, that is able to kind of see what’s going on and almost feel very comfortable and kind of going in this direction or in that direction, right, because again, Blend is our shapeshifter. So for Blend, it’s going to be very easy for Blend to decide, you know how he or she is going to express him or herself, depending upon the situation. And you know, the person they– that they are with, they feel very comfortable and almost playing all different parts at the same time. Because they just have that ability to like shapeshift, right. So Blend can just express him or herself accordingly to whichever situation or group that he or she is in. So it might be if it’s requires to be quiet, they’re okay with that if it requires them to be kind of loud, they’re also okay with that. And if they requires them to be, you know, more confidence and just kind of being able to go with it. They’re okay with that too. Right. So that is Blend our Shapeshifter communicator.
And this is you as the Communication Warrior, where you are standing up nice and tall and you’re able to communicate all of your thoughts, feelings and desires, and you’re able to express yourself the way you want to express yourself. So if you want to express yourself with confidence, you’re able to do that. If you want to express yourself in a way that makes you look like you’re shining and you’re standing out. You can do that. If you want to communicate in a way that you just want to have some quietness, where you just want to draw or paint or something to express yourself through art form. You can do that. You know how to express yourself in your own way that is authentic to you. Because you are the Communication Warrior.
And if you don’t feel like you’re a Communication Warrior yet, that’s okay. Because I’m going to invite you to book a free communication breakthrough session with me by visiting my website GraceSOULutions.com That’s GraceSOULutions.com where we will discover five obstacles that is stopping you. And one thing that you can do to help you to move forward so that you can start to be confident in communicating your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms, so that you can have that happy and harmonious relationship with your partner through communication. And the next video, we’re going to be talking about communication styles. So I’ll see you here next time for that.
And in the meantime, go have fun communicating!
Tone of Voice | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re an introvert, sensitive, people pleaser, who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms: Stay tuned for fun and valuable information.
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the COMMUNICATES game video series, or what I like to call the COMMUNICATES game. Now, if you have missed the previous videos in this series, don’t worry, stay here for now, you can always catch up with the previous videos that I have recorded in this video series later on. So today in this video, we’re going to be talking about Tone of Voice.
Tone of Voice
Now, you know how sometimes somebody’s tone of voice can either uplift you or annoy you, or even perhaps trigger you. So sometimes one person’s voice may be uplifting to one person, but that same tone of voice can either be triggering or annoying to another person. So a tone of voice can almost be subjective, it’s almost depending on how the person perceives that voice or the tone of voice. So somebody who might have a sarcastic personality might have a sarcastic tone of voice. And for one person, they will be okay with that. And then to another person, it might be very triggering. It’s all about the perception. And based on your experiences, and how you’re feeling that day, that tone of voice can either be okay. Or it could be “what the heck.” So we’re going to use the communication characters to talk about the tone of voice. Now, I like to preface that the character that we’re going through, I’m only going to generalized, what the tone of voice might be for the communication characters. So for example, Stance is our confident communicator, and we suspect that Stance will have a certain tone of voice. But it doesn’t mean that Stance can’t have a sarcastic tone of voice. Stance can easily also be a soft spoken, gentle person that has a very gentle soft spoken tone of voice neutral Stance can also show an aggressive tone of voice, it doesn’t matter, there’s all these characters can have all the tone of voices out there. But generally, when we associate a person like who is confident, generally we suspect that that person will have a particular tone of voice. So I’m going to be just talking about a general sense of what tone of voice that the characters may have. So having said that, let’s get started.
Stance – The Confident Communicator
So again, our first character is Stance and Stance is our confident communicator. Alright, so here is Stance. Now Stance, who is our confident communicator, obviously, we’re going to expect that Stance is going to have a confident tone of voice. So what does that mean? Well, most likely Stance is going to have perhaps more of that assertive tone of voice, maybe that no-nonsense Stance could also have that uplifting tone of voice, not like a high pitch or anything like that. But just an uplifting spirit of such that kind of like, makes you feel like “yes, I can do it” right? In a very assertive, no-nonsense kind of way but still very up lifting, that is kind of the tone of voice that we would expect that most of the confident communicators would have. Again, just because Stance is confident and you know, we in generalizing that they would have that sort of tone of voice Stance can easily still have, like I mentioned earlier, a sarcastic tone of voice an aggressive tone of voice, a soft spoken tone of voice anything it’s just, again, Stance is just going to use the tone of voice but it’s going to show that confidence that no-nonsense. Alright. So our next communicator is Brash and Brash is our arrogant communicator.
Brash – The Arrogant Communicator
So this is Brash, our arrogant communicator. And so because Brash has that “out there” type of person banality like likes to shine and be there. And so we might suspect that Brash, his tone of voice, might come off as aggressive and Brash might also have a sarcastic personality. So perhaps might even have a sarcastic tone of voice, just because it depends on the situation. So, you know, again, if Brash is wanting to show like, “Yes, I can, you know, I’m best in this,” or what have, you might show more of that aggression, that more aggressive tone of voice. Brash, can easily have more of a, you know, down to earth tone of voice as well, we just don’t know. Right? You know, it depends on the situation. However, because of the big personality, we, as we suspect that most in most cases, in a general sense, that Brash is going to have that more aggressive, that big personality, type of tone of voice.
Gray – The Timid Communicator
And then we have Gray, our timid communicator. So as you can see, in the picture, Gray is very much wanting to be in a background, right, because you can see the posture and everything. So Gray probably would like to hide, be kind of like blending into the background, hang in the back. So what is the tone of voice that would kind of not draw attention to Gray? That would probably be like this soft and gentle tone of voice, right? Because if you think about like water, you know, being very gentle kind of going with the flow, you can kind of feel like Gray is going to be that type of like, “I don’t want to bring attention to myself.” So Gray is most likely going to have that tone of voice, that will likely not draw attention to him or herself. Having said that, the tone of voice that would likely not draw attention would be that soft and gentle tone of voice. However, that doesn’t mean that Gray can’t be assertive, or have that, you know, uplifting tone of voice and what have you. Certainly Gray can still have that, but perhaps it’s not as big, right? It can perhaps be toned down a bit, even though Gray might have that assertiveness– to it the tone of voice of assertiveness to it, but also might be toned down a little bit. So there’s a bit of softness to it or gentleness to it as well. So again, we’re just generalizing, but certainly in some situations, where Gray might be really comfortable, who knows. Gray might then all of a sudden become that really big, uplifting, you know, person with a big tone of– with a loud tone of voice Who knows, right? Depending on situations but in general, we suspect that Gray will have more of that gentle, a lower tone of voice and and softer tone of voice. Okay, and then we have Blend.
Blend – The Shapeshifter Communicator
Blend is our Shapeshifter communicator. So even though Blend is able to read the room and situations, you know, Blend is going to choose the tone of voice that most likely will best fit the person or in that situation. However, it doesn’t mean that Blend is always going to perhaps choose the right tone of voice to use. Remember, everybody has their own perceptions and some tone of voice can be uplifting to one person, it can be triggering to another person, that same tone of voice that can be uplifting to one can also be triggering for another. However, Blend is most likely also going to be able to kind of figure out which tone of voice might be better for that room or for that situations. But if Blend happens to use the wrong tone of voice Blend might be able to quickly switch and figure out which one will be next best just to kind of make sure that the conversations carry on.
You – The Communication Warrior
And this is what we want for You: You as the Communication Warrior. So this is you as the communication warrior, where you are open and confident in communicating your thoughts feelings and desires with using the right tone of voice that fit with the person and the situation that you are in. However, if you happen to choose the wrong tone of voice, you are the communication warrior. You know how to fix it you know how to shift to a different tone of waste that perhaps that will help you to carry on to have that conversation. Because after all, you no longer are afraid, like, Oops, you don’t know what to do. You’re the communication warrior. You didn’t get the right tone of voice, you know exactly what to do to make sure that it gets shifted in the right direction so that you can continue to have that productive conversation.
But if you don’t feel like you’re a communication warrior yet, that’s okay. I’m going to invite you to visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com. That’s GraceSOULutions.com to book a free Communication Breakthrough Session, where we will discover five challenges or obstacles that are standing in your way, and one action step that you can do that will help you to move forward. And in the next videos, we’re going to see how the communication characters deal with expressing themselves. So stay tuned for that.
And in the meantime, go have fun communicating!
Awareness | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re a sensitive, introverted, conflict phobic person who is also a people pleaser, and we’d love to be able to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms, so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship with your partner. Stay tuned for fun and valuable information.
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the communication warrior game, or what I like to call the communicate game.
Now, if you have missed the other seven videos, in this video series, that’s okay, stay here for now. And you can always catch up with those videos later on.
So in today’s communicate video series, we’re going to be talking about awareness, awareness of your words, awareness of your tone of voice, awareness of your facial expression, body language, hand gestures, and your communication. Because how many of you are truly aware of how you say things, or what you say, in your communication, because I like to present this as an analogy, think of an artist. And in this case, a painter who paints a picture, right, the painter is painting the picture. But as the painter is painting his or her picture, he or she is stepping back, taking a look at what he or she has painted. So far, the painter might add a few more colors, or take away a few colors, or make it a little bit more subtle, because the painter is creating a feeling that he or she wants the viewer that’s viewing the painting, to have to experience and so you as the communicator, you are also creating a feeling and an image of what you want your listener to have when you’re communicating with him. And so you as the communicator, you’re also creating an image or a feeling that you want your listener to have as you are communicating to him or her. So, the painter has tools, paint brushes, paints, Canvas or paper to paint on. And you as your communicator, your tools are your words, your tone of voice, your body language, facial expressions, and perhaps even your hands if you’d like to talk with your hands. And then for the people who are deaf, they communicate using your hands through sign language. So awareness then becomes that you are aware of what you are saying and how you’re saying things along with using all your other tools to create that image and the feeling that you want your listener to have.
So let’s see how the four communication characters the communicators show their awareness and their communication.
So our first communication character communicator is stance dance is our confident communicator. So let’s welcome stance. So, stance is going to be aware of his or her words and actions, you know body language as well as facial expressions, whatever it may be, because scamps is confident. So stance wants to demonstrate the confidence by showing that he or she is aware and because scan’s is aware of his or her words and actions and how it can impact a person’s feeling. When Stan’s communicates with his or her partner, they’re going to take into account that they want to create a certain feeling that they want their partners to have stands and is also aware of the feeling that the partner also is portraying. And so Scam School very clearly will skate why you know your to the partner you’re making me feel this way or your words makes me feel a certain way because stance understands how words can impact a person’s feeling and what words can also create a certain feeling so that is stance
Alright, let’s welcome our next communication character our next communicator will be brash All right Hello brash this is our arrogant communicator and brash isn’t so much concerned about his or her actions or the words. So in some ways, brash may or may not be completely aware of his or her actions or the words they’re saying or how it might impact a person. You know, brash is just concerned about just getting the message out, right. And making sure that whatever needs to be said is said, however, brash may not be completely aware that what he says or what what he or she says, or how they say it might impact the partners feelings, or who they’re speaking to, how it might impact the feeling of the listener, so brash might be a very much of a motivator, wants to motivate the person, or his or her partner, however, because of the words, or the tone of voice or the action of it, and might be off putting, right because it might come off as too aggressive, or too much of, you know, fire or, or what have you that it just doesn’t make the person feel comfortable and brash may or may not be aware of this, right? Because brash just wants to get the message across, like, you can do it, you can get it done, you know, what have you. But the other person that’s listening is kind of like going, Well, I appreciate you letting them let me know, yes, I can do this. But it’s too aggressive for me, then it’s, you know, it almost feels like you’re yelling at me, and I don’t know about you, but I don’t like to be yelled at. Right. So to some people, they don’t mind. They like that, kind of like drill sergeant that yeah, you know, to help them to move and help them to stay on track. For some people, it can be like, you know, you’re yelling at me, I don’t want to be yelled at, I don’t know, you know, do you have to shout at me, I mean, I’m responsible, I do get things done, but you yelling me or I SCORM you making me feel like you’re yelling at me, is not helping me. I don’t feel supported that way. Right. So, you know, again, brash may or may not be aware that that action is creating a certain feeling in the person. Again, they’re just wanting to, you know, their, their intention is to motivate the person, but they might not be aware, like how they’re motivating the person is maybe actually doing the opposite. So that that’s brush, right. So, again, a brush may or may not be aware of how his or her action is actually impacting the person’s feeling.
All right, and so our next communicator is gray, and gray as our timet. Communicator, here is gray. Now, gray is very much a person that wants to avoid conflict, right? Hannah wants to hide in the background a bit, you know. So gray might be one that’s a little bit too overly sensitive of the actions. And other words, gray might be overly hypersensitive, or almost hyper aware of his or her words and actions, that they feel like, every word or every action they do, might create a conflict with a person they’re speaking with, they’re afraid that whatever they say, or a word that is spoken, or an action that is given, you know, a body language or facial expression might be picked up wrong by the other person, that now there’s going to be a conflict because of it. So gray might be like really overly, like a say maybe hyper aware of the words and actions to the point where then it’s almost like great, feel stuck, right? And doesn’t want to say anything or do any thing like me, you know, really aware of the body language. So they might just kind of hold themselves tight and try to keep a neutral face or you know, try to keep their voice as calm as possible, because they feel it maybe in a lot of ways that anything they say or do keep might be picked up wrong. And then therefore creating that conflict that they are trying to avoid. And so a lot of cases gray or timid communicator might be more of the type of person to hold back. Right because, again,
they might feel like the words and the action Some might be picked up wrong, that would create a conflict. So what gray needs to realize is that some times, yes, it can be the words and the actions. However many, many situations, they are not responsible. Right? They’re not responsible how the person is going to react, the sky is blue, the person might react positively like, Hey, son. And for some people, the person might react very badly, like, yeah, it’s blue, and the sun is blinding my eyes, and it’s super hot, and what have you, right? So gray could just simply say, hey, it’s a nice day, the sky is blue. And the other person can be set off by it. Right? Either in a positive way, saying, yeah, the sky is blue, nice day, you know, day to go out where the other person might react very badly and say, yeah, the sky is blue, the sun is blinding my eyes, and it’s super hot outside, yay. Yeah, we can’t do anything in the yard because it’s too hot, or what have you. So what gray needs to realize is communicate in a way that is comfortable for him or her use the words that resonate, and also try to use words that resonate with the person they’re speaking with. And as the person reacts badly, just realize it’s not on gray, it’s actually on the other person. So what is difficult here, it’s about responsibility for our relationships. Yes, we are responsible for our relationships, we are responsible for what we say and how we say things, right? Because we don’t want to be too aggressive. But sometimes we might need to be what we have, perhaps a challenge of is knowing when we are no longer responsible, we’re not responsible for the person’s reaction, we might do things and say things very clearly and in a calm voice, but the other person might pick up wrong. And this is where great my struggle, because in some ways, we’re not responsible for the person being happy or not, we can say all the right things, and do all the right actions. However, that person might not be happy with us, they might still complain. And they might say, Well, you didn’t do this, and you should have done this. And so in some aspect, we can only do the best that we can, and make sure that we’re saying things and doing things to the best of our ability, but how the person reacts that might not be so much on our part. I hope that explains a little bit better. So that’s where some of that communication part. Some of the times it’s kind of difficult is like yes, we’re responsible for our relationship, but how much responsibility do we take and how much do we say, you know, what, this is not part of my responsibility that is on the other person. And I think sometimes it’s that fine line that makes it perhaps difficult for gray to decide or to distinguish of, you know, what I am responsible for that I am able to speak out and what is not part of my responsibility and that is on the other person.
We have bled our Shapeshifter communicator blend. So, blend is going to be able to sense the room since the person sense the situation and then decide how he or she is going to be either going to be like stance, the confident communicator or perhaps brash, the arrogant communicator or perhaps like gray, the timid communicator. So, you know, because blend can sense the room sense the person’s sense of situation, blind is just going to choose and decide, which perhaps the character with a communicator will be better for that situation. Again, there’s no right or wrong way to communicate, or there’s no good or bad communication characters or communicator. You know, each has its strengths as well as its weaknesses. And bland is going to try for the most part to grab on to all the communicators in a positive way to be able to communicate and show awareness of the actions. So in some situations, it might be necessary to grab the positive aspect of brash and in communicating the awareness Right, if the person has a cutting of not paying attention or not being aware of him or herself, bland might just say, You know what, then in this case, I need to be brash, you know, in a positive way. And then perhaps in some situations, blend my say I am, I’m gonna use gray gray strength, in awareness when communicating, and then also perhaps in some situations stance, right. So blend is going to, in most cases, use the positive characters, or the positive aspects of the communication characters. And using the ability of the, of the awareness of each of the characters or whichever characters blend chooses to use, but in a positive way of communicating the awareness of being aware of how he or she communicates as well.
And then, of course, you as the communication character. And this is you being confident, right, and being aware of what you say, and how you communicate to your partner to create that feeling. And if you don’t sometimes need to be like, brash, you’re aware of that. You are also aware when sometimes you might need to be like stance or gray. But you being aware of that, in itself makes you the communication warrior, because you know, then, you know, this is how I need to be, or this is what I this is a character I am going to be or choosing to be, and communicating because you are now aware of that. You’re now creating that image and the feeling that you want your listener to have your partner to have when you’re communicating with your partner. And if you don’t feel like a communication warrior yet.
That’s okay. I invite you to visit my website, Grace solutions.com. That’s GRACESOULU t i o n s.com. To see how you can book a free communication breakthrough session with me, where we will discover five obstacles and one action step that you can take that will move you forward to becoming a communication warrior. And in the next video series, we’re going to be talking about tone of voice. So we’ll see how the four communication characters the four communication communicators deal with tone of voice, so stay tuned for that. Thank you for being here. I look forward to seeing you here again next time.
Now go and have fun communicating!
Choices | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re a sensitive, introverted, conflict phobic person who is also a people pleaser, and you would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires, without the fear of arguments or criticisms, so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship with your partner. Stay tuned for fun and valuable information.
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to The Communication Warrior Game, or what I like to call The COMMUNICATES Game. Now, if you have missed the other videos, in this communicates game video series, that’s okay. Stay here for now. And you can always catch up with the other videos later on.
So in today’s video, in the communicate game, we’re going to talk about choices. Now, sometimes you might have a choice, and it might affect your partner. And in some situations, your partner might agree with your choice or the decision you’re going to make. And sometimes you’re going to make a choice that is good for you. However, your partner may not understand it. And so therefore, there might be some disagreements, or one of you might need to back down or a compromise is going to be made. So what to do when your partner doesn’t agree with the choice that you are making, or a decision that you want to make for yourself. And one of the situations it might be about self development. Right? In a lot of cases, a lot of the choices that we make for ourselves, can lead to improving our self development for self growth. So you might be wanting to lose some weight, or learn to communicate with your partner better. And so you’re looking at programs and you feel like there’s a coach that can help you. But then money comes into play. And so you are making a choice that, “hey, I would love to join this program.” But because of budget or financial reasons, your partner may not agree. So you’re making a choice that you would love to participate. However, there might be some money restrictions attached to it. So what do you do in that situation? What do you do when your partner doesn’t agree with you, or perhaps you feel like your partner may not support you, because there’s other pressing matters, that needs to be taken care of first.
So let’s check in with our four communication characters, and see how they would deal with the situation when they’re faced with choices and how they would communicate it to their partner. So our first communication character is Stance, and Stance is our confident communicator. So welcome Stance.
Alright, so Stance realizes that he or she has a choice. And yes, the choice can impact the family in general, right? Again, let’s just use the example of say, wanting a coach to help with self development. And let’s say it’s for weight loss, or better health, how about let’s do better health because health is important, right? If you don’t have good health, you’re not going to be able to do your job or take care of the person or even take care of yourself. So let’s in this case, let’s talk about improving better health. And so Stance sees a program that could help improve his or her health and of course there’s money attached to it. And in Stance’s mind, it is a lot of money. However, Stance feels like if we budget well, he or she could afford this program. However, Stance’s partner may not understand the program and feel like it could be a waste of money, because scans can just eat healthy and that will be enough and Stance’s mind Stance feels that he or she requires further coaching or further support to help to make sure that the habit sticks. So, Stance realizes that he or she has a choice and your choice will affect the family or the partner. So Stance is going to perhaps present his or her case, right? Present why he or she wants to participate in the program. And Stance may tell his or her partner in a way that’s says, “you know, I understand that you might not agree with me. And you might feel like I can do this on my own. However, for me, personally, I feel I could use an additional support somebody who will hold me accountable, and help me to make this habit stick. So, although you may not agree with me, I would just love for you to support me, just support me. You know, as far as the money is concerned, I understand your concern with you know, the amount. However, I have figured out some budgeting of how I can afford this program without really harming the budget.” So Stance is just going to stand in his or her own power in another words in their own confidence that they acknowledge that their partners may not understand or want to– or feel that it is necessary for Stance to be in the program. Stance understands that his or her partner may not understand why they want to participate in the in the program because they are not wanting to be in a program, right? It’s not for them, but it is for Stance. So Stance acknowledges that, that they may not understand his or her partner may not understand why Stance wants to be in this program. However, they’re not looking for so much of approval, because they already kind of figured out how it can work out. They’re just looking for their partner just to support just to say, yes, okay, I may not understand it. But if this is something you want to do, and you figure it out how to do it, then yes, go ahead and do what you need to do. And if you need an accountability partner, then tell me what I can do to support you and be your accountibility partner when you’re finished with the program, perhaps so Stance’s is just going to be very clear on what he or she requires. So moving on to our next character.
All right here we have Brash and Brash is our arrogant communicator, and Brash is going to be a type of person that perhaps is say, “you know, I have made my choice, you don’t have to agree with me, I’ve made it, I’ve done it, it’s a done deal.” So Brash is just going to do whatever is necessary to help him or herself, right. And they don’t mind whether or not you agree, they have already just put out their credit card number of purchases, and just say, you know what it’s paid for. And whatever else happens, we will figure it out. But I know this is for me, and I’m just gonna go ahead and go right for it. And that is Brash’s choice, he, he or she has made that choice and made a decision that this is a program for them. They say yes, I want it and they’ve done it. And all the finances everything else, they will figure it out as it comes along. Right. But they know that this is what they need. They’ve made the choice, and they have gone for it. And that is Brash. Brash is just, I know what I want, go out for it. And then everything else will all be figured out as they come through. That’s more or less how Brash is going to be regarding to his or her choice. They know what they want. And they go for it. All right, so that’s Brash. And let’s see our next character.
All right, we have Gray, and Gray is our timid communicator. Now Gray knows what he or she wants, and you will love to make that choice of being in the program. However, Gray is going to take an account of everything that budget what the spouse says. And then most likely, a majority of the cases, Gray’s choice is going to be impacted by the other factors, the budget factor, the spouse, and so Gray might just be willing to pause right and hold off actually enrolling in the program. So in Gray’s mind, Gray is going to say well, if not today, and I’m sure this program will be offered again. Gray might be willing just to say you know what? I can’t do it this time but I’ll save up so that perhaps the next time it’s offered, I will be able to enroll in it then. In the majority of situations, Gray is going to be the one that perhaps realize the choice will be good for him or her. However, because of all the other situations, they’re not going to just say, Well, you know, this is what I want, and I’m just going to step into it, they’re going to, most likely, say “Well, I see, you know, what my spouse says, I see the situation, you know, I’m willing to hold off on this choice for now. And I’ll work on saving it up. So the next time the program comes around, I can then enroll in a choice.” And sometimes, and in some situations, Gray might not even be sure if the choice is right for him or herself. So, sometimes Gray might actually go to the partner or go to some other person, a friend or family member, and ask for their advice and say, “Hey, there’s this program. I like it for this and this reason, you know, obviously, there’s some budget things going on. However, I’m not really sure because you know, I’m committed.” But then, of course, there’s time factors, all these other things that comes up. And then I’m in some situations that the choices the decision is made for Gray. You know, people might say, “well, you know, I would probably wait, maybe you can save it up for later. Or, you know, it sounds like you’re interested in a program, however, you know, do you really want to put more things on your plate,” you know, so majority is a situation. So because Gray is not entirely sure whether or not he or she should participate in the program, a lot of times Gray will rely on other people’s advice. And then from there to make the decision of whether or not to participate. So in some situations, it appears that Gray’s choices are made by other people, you know, by the partner or family member or friends, a lot of the times it feels like Gray is not making his or her own choice. So much as sometimes in some situations, it feels like other people are helping Gray to decide or choose whether or not to be in a program. So again, because Gray is, you know, looking at it from all different aspects. And then from their wanting to make the best choice that is more or less for the other people, rather than really looking down for him or herself. You know, Gray is a timid communicator. So Gray again, most likely don’t want to create a conflict. So he’s– he or she’s looking for advice and seeing what the majority of the people think. And then almost making the decision or the choice based on what the popular choice is from other people from the feedback that Gray is getting. So again, there’s not a right or wrong way of making choices is just each communication character, whether it be Stance, Brash or Gray. They’re making the choices and the decisions based on their comfort level based on their personality, and based on so many other different factors. But Gray again, is most likely going to be making a choice based on what the popular vote might be. Even though Gray may feel this program is good for him or her however, again, they’re not entirely sure and so they’re going out and kind of almost collecting the votes and see you know, should Gray actually participate or not in some ways. Not all situations not all to the communicator make choices that way. But in some cases in the majority of cases, perhaps we don’t know all the situations however a majority of cases, timid would make choices based off of kind of like I said popular votes.
All right. And then we have Blend there is Blend so Blend is our Shape Shifter communicator. And so Blend when given a choice may blend and become either Stance or Brash or Gray, right. Sometimes depending upon the situation or the program I’m where the cost Blend is either going to sometimes be like Stance, be like Brash or be like Gray. So, again, Blend can kind of sense the mood sense the situation, and sense whether or not the program is really truly right for him or her. So from there, again, Blend might decide, you know, I’m gonna be like Stance in this situation or I might be like Brash or I might be like Gray when talking to my partner, or a friend or whoever it is about the program that I’m looking to enroll. So Blend is going to say, you know, this is the program, I want to talk to my partner about it. Now, because of this program because of the cause. Today, it’s going to be more like Stance, or it might be more like Brash or a maybe more like Gray. Again, depending upon the situation depending upon, you know, how Blend truly feels about the program.
And then this is what we want you to feel when communicating your choice with your partner, you as a Communication Warrior. You. This is you as the Communication Warrior, where you feel confident, and you can openly communicate your choices to your partner, “hey, I have this program is you know, this is a good fit for me, I can budget we can work it out.” You feel open and confident and communicating to your partner what it is that you want, and why you want to participate in a program, why it’s worth it to you why you feel that this program is a big value for you, for you to right now be in it. And so you no longer feel like you need to hide that, right? You feel like a Communication Warrior, where you are just open and confident and communicating to your partner. And knowing exactly what you need from your partner, whether it’d be support, or it’d be I know exactly how to budget you don’t need to worry about it. Or just to say you know, I’m not really sure. And I would really appreciate your feedback just so I can have a bit more information from, you know, what your thoughts are your perspective, whatever it is that you require, you know how to ask for it.
So that is what a Communication Warrior is all about. It’s about you being confident and communicating what it is that you want, and what it is that you require from your partner. And if you don’t feel like you’re a Communication Warrior yet, that’s okay. I invite you to visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com. That’s GraceSOULutions.com. To see how you can book a free communication breakthrough session with me, where we will discover five obstacles, and one step
that will help you to move forward to becoming a Communication Warrior where you can openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires without the fear of arguments or criticisms so that you can have that happy and harmonious relationship with your partner without ever feeling lonely in your relationship. And in the next video, we’re going to see how the four characters how Stance, Brash, Gray and Blend are going to deal with awareness, awareness of their actions and their communication.
So keep your eyes out for the next video on awareness of action. And again, thank you for being here.
Now go out and have fun communicating!
Inspiration | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re a sensitive, introverted and conflict phobic person, who would love to be able to communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires, without the fear of arguments and criticisms, so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship with your partner, so that you will never feel lonely again in your relationship. Stay tuned for fun and valuable information.
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to COMMUNICATES Game video series. Now, if you have missed the previous six videos that I have created so far, don’t worry, stay here for now. And you can always catch up with those videos later on.
So in today’s video, we’re going to be talking about inspiration in communication. So the definition of inspiration is to make someone feel they want to do something and can do it. So my inspiration for you is that you can communicate openly and honestly of your thoughts, feelings and desires, so that you are seen, heard and understood by your partner, so that you can have that happy and harmonious relationship with your partner. So let’s look at the four characters, and how they deal with inspiration and conversation.
So our first character is Stance, and Stance is our confident communicator. Hello Stance. So Stance is going to be the type of person that inspires you and your conversation. So if you had a question for Stance, perhaps you wanted an advice, or you have an idea, Stance is most likely going to be the type of person that will inspire you through advice, or suggestions, or just even by giving you support. So Stance is the type of person that wants to inspire you. When engaging in conversation, you can bet on Stance most likely will always have your back. And perhaps you are like Stance. Perhaps you aren’t the one that inspires your partner in your communication. Or perhaps you’re the one that always has your partner’s back. No matter what the situation. Or the idea that perhaps your partner shares with you, you will always have his or her back, and perhaps your like, again, like Stance, giving sound advice, at the same time allowing the person to make his or her final decision. You’re just willing to support your partner, even when perhaps you might not agree with your partner’s choice. So perhaps your partner’s like Stance or perhaps you are like Stance where you are inspiring each other in your conversation.
So this is Brash. So Brash our arrogant communicator. Now, Brash is going to be the type of person that perhaps will inspire him or herself. And perhaps you are like Brash, there are many people now who are making the decision or choices to become an entrepreneur or solopreneur. And perhaps you are one of those people that have decided to become an entrepreneur or solopreneur. And when you make the decision to become an entrepreneur or solopreneur, perhaps no one was really on your side. Perhaps you got the advice of stay in your day job, right? Because there is a mindset around having a stable income and being an entrepreneur and solopreneur of course there are risks. So perhaps you weren’t really inspired to become a solopreneur or entrepreneur, however you decided to take bold steps to take that bold action and inspire yourself instead to become an entrepreneur or solopreneur to believe in yourself that you can succeed. So that is the type of person that Brash and that might be you where you are inspiring yourself. You are inspiring yourself to take bold action, when perhaps other people are telling you not to, because of fear, however, you’re going to take that bold action that is best for you, in spite of having fear. So perhaps your partner, or the person you’re communicating with might be like, Brash, where he or she inspires him or herself. And perhaps you’re like, Brash, where you need to inspire yourself to take bold action, especially when it comes to risk. The higher the risk, the more bold action is needed, and more inspiration for yourself, where you need to inspire yourself becomes important, because you need to believe in yourself. And when you believe yourself to succeed, then you’ll start to take the necessary actions that will help you to achieve your goal. So in this case, Brash again is going to be the type of person that will inspire him or herself. And perhaps again, you’re like Brash, and you’re taking bold action, to inspire yourself to achieving your goal that you believe that you can accomplish. And you know that you can accomplish it because of your belief in you.
All right, and next, we have Gray, and Gray is our timid communicator, Gray is most likely going to get inspiration from others. So Gray is most likely going to be the type of person that will ask for other people’s advice, ask for other people’s suggestions, ideas, opinions, gather it all up, because Gray is getting inspiration from others, and helping him or her to make the choice to make the decision perhaps, or to decide whether or not to proceed and move forward based upon the ideas, suggestions and opinions that is given to Gray. So in other words, Gray is getting inspiration from others, and then from others from the suggestions and choices and advice and opinions from others, then we’ll decide whether or not to proceed forward based on the feedback that Gray is getting. And perhaps you are like Gray, where you have a big decision to make. Or perhaps you’re looking for the next title of your book, or perhaps you’re looking for something that is really important in your life. And so you would like to have other people’s ideas and suggestions, and perhaps from receiving other people’s ideas, advice and suggestions and opinions, then from there, you perhaps might get inspired as to what is the next step for you to move forward.
Here and then our next character is Blend. And Blend is our Shape Shifter communicator. So Blend is going to be the type of person because he or she can sense the mood of the person sense the situation that’s going on in the conversation. Blend is then going to be able to choose which character or characters that will be best to either inspire or be inspired in the conversation. And sometimes you might be like Blend, perhaps sometimes you need to inspire or inspire yourself in your conversation. And sometimes you might need to be inspired from other people and you can determine that by the situation and what is going on. So again, you might be speaking to someone who is like Blend, sometimes the person might inspire you or be inspired. And sometimes it might be you that is Blend, where you are inspiring someone or being inspired. Or perhaps you just need to inspire yourself like Brash. So again, Blend is able to shift and choose the character that best fits the situation that is needed in the conversation.
And the goal is for you to be The Communication Warrior. Where you can openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires and know how to inspire others, when to inspire yourself, and when you need to be inspired from others. So you confidently and openly are able to know when to inspire others when you need to be inspired, when you need to inspire yourself, and when you need to be inspired from others. So you are able to confidently and openly communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires and inspire the way you need to, either for the person you’re speaking to, or for yourself, so that you get the inspiration that you need. And you give the inspiration to others as needed, so that you have that harmonious and happy relationship.
And if you don’t feel like you’re a communication warrior yet, that’s okay. I invite you to visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com. That’s GraceSOULutions.com. To see how you can book a free Communication Breakthrough Session with me where we will discover five obstacles that stopping you. And one key thing that you can do to help you to move forward.
In the next video in the COMMUNICATES Game video series. We’re going to see how the four characters Stance, Brash, Gray, and Blend deal with choosing the path in communication. So stay tuned for that.
And until next time, have fun communicating!
Nurture Feelings | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re a sensitive, introverted, conflict phobic person who would love to be able to communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires, without the fear of arguments and criticisms, so that you can have a happy and harmonious relationship so that you will never feel lonely again, in your relationship with your partner. Stay tuned for fun and valuable information!
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the COMMUNICATES Game video series. If you have missed the other videos that I have done, and this video series, don’t worry, stay here for now. And you can always catch up with it later. So if you missed the other videos that I have done in the COMMUNICATES Game video series, that’s okay, stay here for now. And you can always catch up with those videos later. So in today’s video, we’re going to talk about nurturing feelings. Nurturing feelings in your communication. Now you or your partner may or may not be good at nurturing feelings in your communication.
So let me ask you this, have you ever engaged in conversation with your partner, and all of a sudden you or your partner changed, the mood changed? So in the beginning, perhaps you and your partner were having a really relaxing, good, calm, happy conversation. And then either you or your partner said something, and it upset, either you or your partner. And then all of a sudden, it’s like storm clouds are coming in. So either you took offense or your partner took offense, and one of you is just now upset. And either you or your partner decide to walk away from the conversation. And I don’t know about you. Once when you or your partner walk off, are you stumped? Like, all of a sudden, do you wonder like, Hey, what happened? It started off like a really good conversation, you’re stumped. And you’re like, “hey, we had a good conversation, everything was fine. And then all of a sudden, I said something or he or she said something. And now all of a sudden, one of us is upset and walked away from the conversation to cool off.”
So what happened? Right, so this is where nurturing feelings in the conversation in your communication becomes important because perhaps, if you gave some awareness to it, you might have realized that there were some clues as to how you were feeling or to how the other person was feeling during that conversation. You know, in the beginning, it was probably really good, you know, you’re joking with each other or something, you know, was said. And then somebody made a comment or their you made a comment or your partner made a comment, and all of a sudden, now the storm clouds have come in. So with the nurture feelings, it’s about looking for the subtle hints, so for subtle changes of either the conversation shifting from being happy to stormy clouds, or perhaps you can switch it like maybe the clouds are stormy and you see that and now you’re going to figure out how you can pivot and then you can see like there’s stormy clouds. But however, instead of getting further into the stormy clouds, because you see it coming, that perhaps you can pivot and maybe maneuver to a different direction by making either a little bit of a humorous statement, or perhaps saying something that’s more nurturing, so that you can pivot it back to instead of going further into the storm clouds. Now you can still go back to being having that sunny, happy conversation that you originally maybe had, or as this conversation has already begun storming, because it was a very serious conversation. Perhaps you don’t have to make it so serious. Perhaps you can also put a little bit of some light heartedness into this serious conversation so that it’s not going to be going further and to that storm clouds. And perhaps it’s not always the case, perhaps in some situations, you know, it’s going to be storm clouds, and you’re just doing your best to navigate through the storm clouds. But there might be some chances of yes as being storm clouds that perhaps there’s some way to lighten up the storm and again, by nurturing the conversation with some certain nurturing words, or some nurturing gestures.
And again, if there’s a shift from a happy conversation to a stormy conversation that’s coming up, again, look for those subtle hints, and then see about how to pivot away from it. Again, when you have that awareness of nurturing the conversation, and that could be just as simple as you know, being aware of what you said, perhaps, you know what you said, the other person took it wrong, right. So you might be able to change that. Or, if you see the other person, your partner, all of a sudden, is in a relaxed body posture, like with open arms and smiling, and all of a sudden, you said something, and now the your partner has his or her arm crossed, or all of a sudden, the face changed to almost like a serious looking tone, where the smile is no longer there, or perhaps just like kind of a small smile, not as big as what it was. These are little things that you can see like, oh, perhaps did I say something or, you know, and again, the same way. And once when your partner is aware, and can nurture the conversation, he or she can also maybe see when you’re getting a little bit upset and learn to pivot as well.
So this is where nurturing feelings in your conversation in your communication becomes important because it’s almost like another way of validating of your feeling now of what was being said and what was being discussed. And it’s an acknowledgement that “hey, I was okay. And then something was said, and now I’m not okay.” So and who doesn’t want to be validated? Right? So sometimes validation doesn’t have to be through words. It can be just saying, acknowledging like, “Oh, my goodness, there’s now a change in the mood in the conversation. I acknowledge that I acknowledged you’re changing, you’re in the mood that you’re in now in. So let’s see what we can do to fix it to repair it.” Right.
We’re going to talk about the nurture feelings. I’m using the four characters. Okay, so my first character is Stance and Stance is our confident communicator. So with the confident communicator, we’re just going to look at how each character’s not necessarily read or pivot in nurturing the feelings in the conversation, but how they might kind of address the nurturer feelings in the conversation. Starting with Stance, our confident communicator. Yay, hello Stance. Alright, so Stance is going to be the type of person that will try his or her best to monitor the feelings in the conversation. So Stance is most likely going to be the type of person that will do his or her best to see, you know, have an awareness of the person’s mood in a conversation. So if there is a subtle change Stance is going to do his or her best to kind of notice if the subtle changes and perhaps some person’s mood during the conversation, because again, Stance wants to have that constructive conversation. And so Stance again, is just confidence. And so he or she is going to try his or her best, you know, to see how the person is feeling, right? If the person is having a happy conversation, and all of a sudden the mood changes Stance is likely going to pick up on it and perhaps even try his or her best to pick up on it. As soon as like they’re heading into the storm clouds, like the person who has his or her arm crossed, Stance might, you know, kind of take awareness of that, so to speak, and say, oh, okay, maybe I said something or something was said and so Stance might just check in and say, Hey, are you okay? Did I just say something wrong? Because of the subtle, maybe body change. So, again, sometimes Stance might miss it, but Stance is going to be the type of person that will do his or her best to make sure that the feelings are being nurtured in the conversation notice any subtle changes so that the conversations can continue on onto a constructive path rather than a destructive path. So that is Stance.
All right. Our next communicator is Brash and Brash is our arrogant communicator. So here’s Brash, Brash is more concerned about making sure that he or she looks good, right? Looks the best. So Brash is most likely not going to be a good communicator when it comes to nurturing feelings. Because, again, Brash is only worried about making sure he or she looks good and looking the best. And sometimes that might mean not being aware of nurturing feelings, because again, they just want to make sure they look good. So it’s not so much about how the other person feels, they might, you know, boast about their achievements and what have you, while the other person may not be feeling good about it, but Brash is not going to be aware of that Brash is most likely going to just, you know, continue on and say, Look, kind of, like, continue on with his or her achievements, say, Look at me, and, you know, I did this and this and this, you know, not kind of stepping back a little bit and saying, but, you know, everybody else did great here or something like that, you know, and most likely is just that Brash is gonna say, Yeah, I did great. So hey, you know, pay attention and not so much as being aware of how the other person might be feeling, right? When it comes to nurturing feelings, I don’t want to say that Brash doesn’t nurture feelings, is just that perhaps Brash is more, because the intention is to make him or herself looking good. Sometimes that means, you know, not paying attention to other things such as nurturing feelings, you know, the intention is not to be aware of how the other person’s feeling. The intention is more about making sure he or she looks good. So sometimes that, means that what gets missed is the nurturing feeling in the communication in the conversation. And not to say that Brash will always miss, you know, the feelings or will always, you know, miss on the opportunity to nurture feelings, you know, perhaps, you know, afterwards in a in Brash’s way, he or she might just say, oh, you know, you’ll get there next time, or I’m sure, you know, you’ll, you’ll achieve that someday, you know, type of thing. And, again, it’s maybe Brash’s way of just saying, hey, you know, I know I did great and everything and, but you know, in Brash’s way of saying, you know, you’ll, you’ll get it sometime in the future, perhaps it’s just saying, you know, there is opportunity for you as well. And that’s Brash’s way perhaps nurturing feeling, you might be like, Brash, or you might know somebody like Brash, and that’s okay. Sometimes we do want people to look at us, right? To look at the are achievements. And then sometimes, you know, we just might need to still be a little bit aware of the feelings. So with Brash, it’s just very, I’m going to just start off saying it is very difficult to address the nurturing feelings with Brash because Brash is so concerned is more concerned about making him or herself looking good. Again, what gets lost will be the nurturing feelings, I don’t want to say that Brash always misses the opportunity of nurturing feelings. However, because it’s not really top priority Brash is going to be the type of person that really just focused on him or herself. And not so much on the other person. So sometimes you almost need to be a Brash yourself, to bring out that nurture feeling of what you need. So perhaps you just need to, you know, be– be, like Brash and say, “You know what, I’m feeling this way, and you need to stop or, you know, I’m happy for your accomplishments, but everybody deserves a chance,” right? So sometimes you yourself need to be like, Brash in order for your partner who might be Brash to understand, you know, where the boundaries are, where for nurturing of feelings, and making sure that whatever needs to be addressed is addressed. And you might have to do that in a brash way for Brash to understand. Alright, so, hope that makes sense.
All right, now we’re moving on to our third character. All right, so our third communication character communicator is Gray. So Gray is our timid communicator. Hello gray. So, Gray is going to be a type of person that is going to nurture the other person rather than nurture him or her Self. So Gray is a type of person that is fully aware of how the other person is feeling during the conversation. Gray is going to notice the subtle changes right away not to say that Gray gets it all the time. But Gray gets it, most of the times the majority of the time Gray is on top of it notices this shift in the conversation notices, the feeling of the other person based on perhaps the tone or the body language or something Gray is going to pick up on it because Gray is more concerned about how the other person is feeling in the conversation than about him or herself. So Gray is more like that observer and the communication group. Because again, Gray stepping back, you know, stepping away from being in the limelight. So Gray prefers to be just in the background and observing and processing. So Gray is going to be the one that observes and process what you are saying to him or her. And then from there, Gray is going to say, “okay, I can continue this path or Oh, the person– I sense that this person is not happy.” And you know, and so Gray is going to apologize and acknowledge like perhaps it was something he or she said or something that happened. So Gray is more wanting to have that peace and calm and you know, in the conversation and trying to avoid the conflict and the argument. So in that aspect, that’s why Gray is going to be more engaged and more aware of, you know, picking up any subtle hints to pick up the mood and a change in the conversation so that Gray can then move on and move away from any conflict or argument that might be creeping up. So that is why Gray is more likely to be aware of the subtle changes in the communication and the gestures and what have you saw that, again, Gray is wanting the person to feel like they are being nurtured and acknowledged that there’s might be a change. And then if, you know, Gray feels like he or she that caused the change will apologize and everything. Again, it’s all about trying to move away from the argument and a conflict.
Okay, so then we have Blend and Blend is our Shapeshifter communicator. So there’s Blend, all right. So, Blend, again, because Blend can sense the room sense the person, Blend is just going to see how the situation is what is happening, and then determine which communication character would best fit into the situation that will continue to nurture the feelings in a conversation with his or her partner. So according to Blend, whether Blend is going to be like Stance or Brash or Gray, it would all depend on the communication situation, what’s being discussed and where the changes and why they change. And then from there, Blend then can decide which of the communication character or characters will be best to address the changes in the communication and make sure to nurture it in a way so that again, it can be constructive, rather than destructive, because Blend is good at sensing the mood of the person or of the situation, he or she is just going to decide and choose the characters that were best fit the situation to continue to nurture the feeling in his or her communication.
And then, of course, the goal is for you to be the Communication Warrior. So this is you as the Communication Warrior, where you can communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires confidently openly. You know how to best nurture feelings in your communication. And if you don’t feel nurtured in your communication by your partner, you know how to communicate that with confidence so that you are being heard and understood by your partner so that you can have that happy and harmonious relationship with your partner.
So this is what being a Communication Warrior is all about. Now If you don’t feel like you’re a Communication Warrior yet, that’s okay. I’m going to invite you to visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com That’s GraceSOULutions.com to see how you can book a free Communication Breakthrough Session with me, where we will discover five obstacles that are stopping you, and one key thing that you can do to help to move you forward and in the next COMMUNICATES Game videos we’re going to see how the four characters Stance, Brash, Gray and Blend deal with inspiration in communication.
So until next time, have fun communicating!
Misunderstandings | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re a sensitive, introverted, conflict phobic person, who would love to be able to communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires, without the feeling of being overlooked, overshadowed and overwhelmed in your communication, so that you can have that happy and harmonious relationship. Stay tuned for fun and valuable information.
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to the COMMUNICATES Game video series. Now, if you have missed the previous videos, and this COMMUNICATES Game video series, that’s okay, stay here for now. And you can always catch up to those videos later.
So in this video, we’re going to talk about misunderstandings, or what happens when a communication breaks down. When communication is lost, or the understanding is lost, because there was a breakdown in the communication. And to talk about misunderstandings, or about communication breakdowns, of course, we’re going to use our four communication characters. So let’s get started.
All right, so our first communication character is Stance. So Stance, of course, is our confident communicator. And here is Stance, all right. So when a communication breakdown occurs, or when some misunderstanding may have occurred, Stance is going to be the type of person that is likely to find out what happened and perhaps take him or herself accountable for perhaps the misunderstanding that has occurred. So Stance is going to want to know what happened. And of course, then make sure that he or she takes accountability if necessary to the communication breakdown, and then figure out how to pivot so that the communication can continue. So an example might be, you know, if Stance happens to be talking to a person while that person was busy, and the person didn’t listen, or didn’t hear what Stance might have said, and then there was a misunderstanding of what the person wants to do, then Stance is going to say, “well, I said this, but perhaps you didn’t hear me because you were distracted. And I should have realized not to converse with you or tell you these instructions until you were less distracted.” So Stance then will make sure that next time that he or she gives the instructions or the information that the person is not distracted by other things. And so, that would be how Stance as a confident communicator might deal with communication breakdowns or when misunderstandings occur. So you perhaps you are like Stance, and in some situations, you might say “this is what I did. And now I know what to do better next time.”
All right, moving on to our next character. So here we have Brash and Brash is our arrogant communicators. So let’s welcome Brash All right. So Brash might be a type of person that when a communication breakdown occurred, that he or she may not take full responsibility. And in other words, Brash might likely to put the blame on the other person. So again, remember Brash is type of person that wants to make him or herself look good. And so by making himself look good, it’s having to make the other person look not so great. And one of the ways to do that is to put the blame on the other person. So if a misunderstanding occurred, or there was a communication breakdown, you know, again, if the other person was distracted, then Brash might say something like, “you know, I told you this, obviously, you didn’t hear me well next time when I tell you something, you need to stop what you’re doing and pay attention to what I am telling you.” So Brash is likely not going to hold him or self accountable in a way that Stance might have done Brash is going to most likely, because again, making him or herself look great. So would most likely put the blame on the other person for the misunderstanding (that type of attitude). Now sometimes, because like I mentioned before, there are no good or bad characters. Sometimes it is necessary perhaps to be like Brash, you know? In some situations, perhaps, it is not fully Brash’s responsibility. It might be the other person’s responsibility and so Brash may feel he or she is right. Or perhaps he or she has the reasoning to say, “You know what, next time, you really need to stop what you’re doing, and listen to what I’m telling you,” because perhaps it might be something of an emergency, something urgent, and, you know, Brash might say, “you know, I did call your name, and I did say that this was important, and I need you to, to listen to this, and you didn’t.” So in that case, perhaps, you know, there might be some situations where you might need to be, like, Brash, and say, “Hey, you should have listened.” So it’s, I don’t want to say putting the blame, and I know I used that word earlier, but it’s just to put the responsibility or the accountability on to the person and maybe perhaps, with Brash, sometimes you need to put more of that accountability on the other person, depending upon the situation. So sometimes, yes, it can be a little bit tricky. And that is why, you know, communication is like a game, right? Because sometimes you have to maneuver around obstacles. And misunderstanding is one of those obstacles that I have mentioned in the previous videos of when I talked about obstacles, and misunderstanding happens to be one of those. So again, it’s how to maneuver around it. So anyway, that might be helped Brash with deal with a misunderstanding, is putting the accountability or the responsibility on to the other person for why the misunderstanding occurred.
And so our next character is Gray, and Gray is our timid character. So let’s meet Gray. All right, so when a misunderstanding occurs, Gray is most likely going to be the type of person to say, “I’m sorry.” Gray is just going to apologize for the misunderstanding that occurred. So you know, an instruction was given to Gray, obviously, Gray might have been distracted, and didn’t fall through or something? And the person comes back to Gray and say, hey, you know, why didn’t you do this? Or, you know, I said this, and this was not done correctly. And Gray is gonna most likely just say, “I’m sorry, I misunderstood you. I didn’t hear you properly out corrected right now. And I’m just very sorry,” not going to say, Oh, you did this, or you could have done this no Gray, it’s just going to take the full responsibility that okay, the misunderstanding occured, yes, it was my fault, I could have done better. And now I’m going to remedy the situation as best to my ability, so that we can just move on from this experience, because again Gray doesn’t necessarily feel comfortable when there’s an argument or conflict. So Gray is just going to apologize and fix the problem. And try then to have it move on. So that the conflict and the argument can be resolved. So that might be like you or you might know somebody who is like Gray. And again, in some situations, you know, that’s might be the best way, you know, you were given some instructions, and you know, you didn’t follow through or the person didn’t follow through. And sometimes the best way is just to apologize, try to fix the problem if you can, right then and there or as quickly as you can, and then hopefully, that just solves a problem. So that way, everybody is no longer upset and then conversations, activities can carry forward.
Okay, and then of course, we have our character Blend and Blend is our Shape Shifter communicator. Yay, there’s Blend. So Blend is a type of person that can sense the mood of the person or of the room. And if a misunderstanding occurs, Blend is the type of person that’s going to see the situation and then decide perhaps you know which character or characters he or she is going to be in to help to solve the misunderstanding to help to repair the communication. And so in some situations, Blend is gonna maybe perhaps start off as great apologize, fix it, and then perhaps be like Stance and say, You know what, I take full responsibility. I should have like clarified with you when I wasn’t sure next time, if I’m not sure I know what we’ll know to ask the questions I need to ask whatever it might be.” So and in some situations, it might be that Blend decides he or she needs to be more like Brash and then perhaps then move to a Stance or you know, move on to a different character. So, again, Blend is going to just see the situation figure out what would be the best way to be, you know, what character communication character to be to solve the problem to resolve the communication breakdown to resolve the misunderstanding, so that the next time it won’t occur or if it does, he or she knows what to do, and or hold himself or herself accountable if a mistake happens. So it all just really depends on the situation. And that’s what Blend is good at its Blend is good at being the shapeshifter and figuring out which character or characters to be to solve the communication breakdown, and to solve the misunderstandings. And so that hopefully doesn’t happen again the next time or knows how to solve it when it occurs, so that everybody hopefully can move on.
So before I move on to our next character, I just want to let you know that for our next video, we’re going to see how the four characters Stance, Brash, Gray and Blend deal with nurturing feelings in communication. So stay tuned for that video next month.
Alright, so this is the goal that we want for you to be the Communication Character. Yay! And this is the Communication Warrior: You! Where you can communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires, and be able to repair any misunderstandings or communication breakdown, as you want to be to repair your communication breakdown or misunderstandings so that no matter in whatever situation or the person you’re speaking with, you feel like that Communication Warrior that you are being the character the communication character or characters you want to be when dealing with the communication breakdown and the misunderstanding.
And if you don’t feel like you’re a Communication Warrior yet, then I invite you to visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com That’s GraceSOULutions.com to see how you can book a free communication breakthrough session with me where we will discover five obstacles that stopping you and one action step that you can take to move you forward.
So until next time, go and have fun communicating!
If you’re an introverted, sensitive, conflict-phobic person who would love to become and feel like a communication warrior then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that is stopping your from becoming a communication warrior.
Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com
Body Language | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test
If you’re an introvert, sensitive, conflict phobic person who would love to be able to communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires without the feeling of being overlooked, overshadowed and overwhelmed, stay tuned for fun and valuable information.
Hi, I’m Grace, and welcome to The Communicates Warrior Game video series, or what I like to call The COMMUNICATES Game. If you missed the previous videos that I have done for this video series, that’s okay, stay here for now. And you can always catch up with the previous videos later.
So today’s video, we’re going to talk about body language and facial expressions. So we’re going to do so by using the four characters that we have been discussing so far.
All right, so we have our first character Stance. And remember, Stance is our confident communicator. So let’s introduce Stance. All right, so here is Stance. And, as you can see, Stance is standing up nice and tall, shoulders back, back straight. And it’s also doing a power pose. Why? Because when you’re confident, you might feel like you’re a superhero. And what do superheroes like to do? They like to stand in their power pose! Yes, they like to feel that extra power, that confidence that they have in helping people, right? So you might be like Stance, the confident communicator, where you are standing nice and tall and straight. And you feel like that superhero because you’re helping and empowering people in your own way, whatever it is that you do. Now, as you can also see, Stance has a smile on the face. And why does Stance have smile on his or her face, because Stance is a type of person that is happy, passionate and enthusiastic about what he or she is sharing. And when you have that passion and enthusiasm, what are you going to do, you’re going to smile naturally, right? So when Stance makes eye contact, it’s going to make the person feel inclusive, and perhaps you’re like Stance, the confident communicator so that when you make eye contact with that person that you’re speaking with, or the group that you’re talking to, you’re going to make them feel inclusive. So you’re going to make the appropriate eye contact, just the right amount of eye contact, so that the person knows that they are included into your conversation. And you are engaging them in the topic that you’re discussing, because you want them to also feel the passion and the enthusiasm of the topic that you’re discussing, or you want them to feel inclusive, in the discussion. So you’re going to help the person or the group that you’re speaking to, to feel inclusive by making the appropriate eye contact, as well as having a smile on your face, standing up nice and tall and believing when you’re speaking about so that the people can also feel the same passion and also feel they are part of the discussion. And everyone is included. Right? Everyone’s included in the discussion. No one is left out and everyone feels empowered in the topic. All right. So that is Stance.
All right now we have Brash, Brash is our arrogant communicator. So as you can see, Brash also has the big positive posture, right, the shoulders back standing up straight, great posture. However, Brash is not afraid to take up space, and perhaps Brash is also going to take up your personal space. Why? Because again, Brash is interested in making him or herself look great and stand out in the crowd. Brash is also going to be the type of person who makes eye contact with you. But it almost feels like it’s a stare or a dare. Right? When Brash, makes eye contact. It’s more like Oh, who is going to be the better person that comes out of this? So it’s almost like a dare As in, I dare you to be the best or I dare you to be, like better than me where it’s almost feeling like who is going to show up as the best person. So, perhaps, sometimes it is necessary to be like, Brash, right? You know, like I say, there’s no good or bad characters, all characters are necessary. And sometimes because of the hard work you have put in, and you know, all the things that you have done. And you would like to have that recognition. And nobody in– perhaps is recognizing, so what do you have to do, right? You– you want to show up. And so, you know, perhaps, you know, you do show up as like Stance, but nobody stills paying attention. So now you’re going to show up as Brash, be bigger than you know the person or be bigger as or as big as you can be? Right? So that you’re taking up space, and so that people are now noticing you noticing your accomplishments, noticing all the work that you’ve done, so that you can finally be recognized for the hard work that you have put in. And so, you know, sometimes it’s necessary to be like, Brash, and sometimes you might encounter someone who’s like, Brash. And so sometimes you might be in a situation where you are in the presence of someone who is like, Brash, and perhaps wants to be the type of person that wants to be the best to stand out. And then it’s up to you to decide or to choose whether or not you’re going to outshine Brash in by being Brash yourself, or if you’re going to step back a bit and be a different character. So, again, Brash is just interested, and looking the best in the group, right? So and by doing that, it’s, you know, perhaps the eye contact might almost be like a dare like, of, you know, I dare you to be better than me, I dare you to, you know, outshine me. And also the body language is, you know, they’re going to stand up tall, and perhaps almost feel like they’re taking up space and taking up your space and taking up everyone’s space. So that again, the only person that is shining and is looking the best right again, is going to be Brash. Alright, so now we’re gonna move on to our next character.
Alright, so our next character is Gray. And again, Gray is our timid communicator. All right, so you can see with Gray, you know, the posture is not so strong, right, it’s the back the shoulders not back, but rather rounded. And you can see that with the timid not only is the shoulder rounded, but in a way timid wants to kind of hide, right again, timid is a type of person that likes to process information doesn’t really want to stand out. So the postures in a way, kind of in a shrinking pose, so that again, Gray doesn’t stand out and blends in the background, right. So kind of goes in the background in order to be able to process the information that he or she is listening rather than stepping forward right away so Gray doesn’t necessarily want to notice right away because again, he or she would like to listen and process the information and so it’s easier to do that when you’re in the background. So a lot of the times they don’t feel like they want to stand up nice and tall and straight because again, the whole purpose is to blend in the background and in some situations Gray may make eye contact you know and it’s gonna be kind of quick it’s gonna be like a look and look away perhaps Gray might also have a smile but it’s going to be just kind of a very minimal subtle smile not a really big you know, showed the whole teeth kind of smile but just so you know like almost like that Mona Lisa type of smile I like to say just again closed mouth minimal subtle smile and again make try to avoid eye contact Gray may try to avoid eye contact again trying not to draw attention to him or herself or perhaps does make eye contact but again may just cut a eye contact and a quick look away and you know, it might be again with Gray he or she is not wanting to stand out he or she perhaps just want to listen and process what is going on. So Gray might be the shy person. And so in Gray’s mind, like you can see this picture there’s like a lot of question marks and exclamation points because there’s a lot of thoughts that is going in Gray’s mind of you know what the other person might be thinking about and all these other things that’s going on. So again, Gray is just going to do whatever he or she can to not stand out to blend, like I say into the background.
All right, and then we have our character Blend. So Blend is our Shape Shifter communicator. All right, and there’s Blend. So because blend can sense the room can sense the mood of the person or the group that he or she is speaking to or speaking, with, Blend is going to determine which character will be best in that situation is going to be the confident communicator or like Stance or is it going to be better to be like Brash or Gray because depending upon the situation, you know, in a topic, it might be appropriate to one to empower the group, right? So therefore, Blend is then going to be like Stance, or perhaps Blend feels like you know, what I’m doing all this work, I’m not getting recognized, you know, what, I’m going to show up bigger than myself much bigger, and so therefore, it might show up as Brash. And sometimes because Blend might feel like, you know, what, there’s a lot of discussions going on, I have my ideas, but you know, maybe I’m gonna hold off a bit, and I’m just gonna listen and process what some other people are saying first, before I jump in, and then you know, I’ll share so perhaps then, and that case, Blend is going to be like Gray, you know, not stand out kind of be part of the background initially, and then decide perhaps at the right moment, okay, now I’m going to be like Stance, or I’m going to be like, Brash, so with Blend again, blend is a shapeshifter. So depending upon the situation, Blend is going to use the body posture, that’s the most appropriate to the character that he or she wants to represent and the discussion.
And, of course, our goal is this, you as the Communication Warrior, where you are standing up nice and tall smile on your face. And you are communicating your thoughts, feelings and ideas the way you want to using the appropriate body language that you want to represent the message that you are sharing. So whether it be that you want to share your passion and enthusiasm like Stance, so you’re using a posture as the confident communicator, or if you want to be bigger than yourself. So you’re going to show up as Brash, using the posture as such, or you’re going to want to listen and process the information. And so you’re going to use the body posture as Gray in order to do that, or you’re going to be like Blend and be able to sense the room. And so know which character you want to be to represent how you want to show up in your communication. But whichever character you choose, you feel like that Communication Warrior, that you know exactly what body language, what facial expression you want to use, so that your message is loud and clear and understood by others of what you are communicating. So that is the goal, you as the Communication Warrior.
Now if you don’t feel like you are a Communication Warrior just yet. That’s okay. Because I’m going to invite you to book that free communication breakthrough session with me visit my website, GraceSOULutions.com. That’s GraceSOULutions.com to see how you can book a free Communication Breakthrough Session with me, where we will walk through five obstacles that is stopping you from becoming a Communication Warrior, and one step that will guide you to become the Communication Warrior that you would like to be. In the meantime, if you haven’t watched the previous videos, you can go watch them now and in the next video, we’re going to see how each of the four characters Stance, Brash, Gray and Blend deal with misunderstandings when they occur in communication.
So until next time, go and have fun communicating!
Messages | The COMMUNICATES Game
// by Preston Test