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Communicating With Confidence | Sensitive Communication Tips

Hi, Grace here, and welcome to Sensitive Communication Tips.

So, each of the videos, we’ll start off with one of the letters to do with the word communicates. So we’re going to start with the letter C, in the word communicates. And so what does the letter C stand for? Communicate with confidence. So here are some tips to help you to communicate with confidence.

Tip number one smile. So when we are nervous or shy, sometimes we forget to smile, our face actually tightens up. However, when we smile, we not only brighten up the person’s day, the room, we also brighten ourselves up. And when we brighten ourselves up, we naturally will feel confidence. So remember, no matter if you’re shy, or if you’re nervous, just smile. Because when you smile, you brighten up the day, you brighten up the person’s day, the room, and you. So tip number one, smile.

Tip number two, stand with confidence. So what do we mean by that stand up straight, not only does standing up straight help with the posture, and I’m sure you have heard somebody during your lifetime “stand up straight!” So again, it’s not only good for the posture, but when you stand up straight, you also will gain confidence, I stand at five feet two inches tall, but when I stand up straight, I feel just as tall as the person I’m talking to. And sometimes the people I talk to are six feet two inches tall. So when I stand up straight, I feel just as tall as the six feet two inches per tall person that I’m speaking to. So stand up straight, because that will boost up your confidence.

And tip number three, speak clearly. So I know some of you are fast talkers. And definitely there’s nothing wrong with being a fast talker. As long as you’re speaking clearly. However, just be aware that not everybody has a very fast processing speed. So while you might be talking fast, and you know what you’re talking about, the person that’s listening to you has to process what you are saying and they may not be able to process it fast enough. And sometimes that can cause some confusion or some misunderstanding. Having said that, you don’t want to speak too slow either. Because then again, that might bore the person. So it’s finding the right speed, finding the right comfort rate– comfortable rate for you to speak at. So as long as you’re comfortable with the speaking rate that you are communicating, then that will help to boost your confidence because then you’re going at your own comfortable rate. And when you do that, naturally, you’ll probably just feel confident.

So those are the three tips. Tip one smile, tip two stand up straight, and tip three, speak clearly. So I hope you found these tips to be helpful. And if you did, you can always feel free to visit my website GraceSOULutions.com That’s GraceSOULutions.com to book a free communication breakthrough session with me on how you can improve your personal communication, no matter who you are communicating with or the situation you are communicating in.

Thank you for being here. I look forward to seeing you here next time. Bye for now!

October HOOP With Grace

What fears do you have? What fears would you like to drop and release? What fears are sticking around and refusing to go? What can you do to get rid of or transform your fears?

In the United States, and some other countries we celebrate Halloween in October. Halloween is known for the witches, vampires, ghosts, spooky things, and horror.

Although some of us don’t like to be scared or experience fear, we tend to seek it it out in October.

You might not like creepy horror movies, but you might just end up watching one or two horror movies because it’s Halloween!

To get ready for the spirit of Halloween, the October blog story is all about FEAR…

You might be thinking, what does hooping or hula hoop have to do with fear?

Read on to find out if you dare…

How many you have the Fear Of Perfectionism?

I do my best to take care of my hula hoop; however, depending upon where I hoop, this can happen…


My beautiful hoop has blemishes. It is no longer ‘perfect’.

In what areas in your life do you feel you are not ‘perfect’ or what you are doing is not ‘perfect’?

Here’s the thing, perfection isn’t your enemy, and you don’t have to fear that you aren’t perfect.

There isn’t anything wrong with being perfect so long as you pay attention to the right details as a perfectionist that moves you forward, and not at the details that makes you stand still.

By the way, Yes, I think my hoop is beautiful and perfect with the blemishes, and it’s my go to hoop dance partner.

How many of you have the Fear Of Failure?

Who doesn’t? Even the most successful people have this fear.

One of the advices that has been shared in combating the fear of failure is through gratitude.

Have an attitude of gratitude. When you focus and think of all the things you are grateful for and what you have accomplished, you’ll forget about the things that didn’t work out.

Have you noticed that sometimes when things didn’t work out that it benefitted you in the end?

How many of you have the Fear Of Change?

How many of you stay at the job you hate because of fear of change? You would rather stay and suffer because you know the status quo.

Change is inevitable.

What I found helpful when going through changes is thinking about the lifecycle stages of the butterfly.

When I am going through changes in my life, I identify what stage I am currently at during my changes.

When you think about it…when you and I go through changes we are going through the stages and processes that the butterfly goes through. The caterpillar stage, chrysalis stage, and butterfly stage.

By thinking of my changes in terms of butterfly stages, it doesn’t seem as scary. Heck, who doesn’t like butterflies?

Here is my version of being a butterfly!

 

My hoops aren’t perfect, I am not a perfect hooper, I have failed many times with my hooping tricks, and yet I have bloomed to be a butterfly through the different changes and stages of my hooping experience.

The moral of this story is…

Focus on details that will move you forward, have an attitude of gratitude towards your accomplishments and things you have in your life at the present moment, and think of yourself as becoming a butterfly when going through changes in your life.

The fact is we all have fears. I only touched on three fears, but there are many fears out there. If I listed them all here, well, it would end up being a book, and then no one would get any sleep because of fear.

Some fears are easy to drop and release, and some fears tend to stick around for a while, and some others may make themselves so comfortable that they can’t take the hint that it’s time to leave until we kick them out!

Would you love to transform your fears and kick them out? Who wouldn’t?

Transform your fears by surrendering your fears.

According to Judith Orloff, MD, “Surrender is the divine art of letting go—the ability to flow instead of clenching, obsessing, and over-controlling.”

The definition of Surrender by Dr. Mitchell Friedman, “Surrender means you change direction. You give up AND you get going in a different way. Surrender demands constant action in support of the change. To surrender is necessary to improve and realize one’s potential. That is a very important point.”

Remember:

Remember the movie, “Ghostbusters”? The main characters in the movie work on capturing and getting rid of the ghosts that plague the city. Well, there are plenty of people out there teaching us how to bust our fears, and when we put into practice busting our fears, I like to think of ourselves as “Fearbusters”!

If you are driven to taking care of you and to being heard, then

Contact me here and I’ll get you started on the right path.

Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Transition Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu is an expert Transition Navigator who will help you to navigate through your biggest challenges about yourself when going through your career, relationship, health, or other life transitions.

Through my programs: WORRY Eliminator, Color Code Personality, and Discover Your Sacred Gifts, I teach you how to deliberately use and navigate the program that will get you to live more of your Soul’s purpose.

As a Transition Navigator, I will help you to design, navigate, and manifest the results you want in your life with peace, happiness, ease, and grace. Together we solve your problems so that you create a whole new way of looking at life.

September HOOP With Grace

What are you manifesting, want to manifest, or have manifested? In what area of your life do you feel abundance?

I like to think of September as the month of appreciating all of your hard work that you have done thus far. Looking at how far you have come and what you have manifested in your life from the fruits of your labor.

Look at what has been manifested and what abundance have been created from your hard work.

Of course there might be some areas in your life that you may not feel abundant, and what you wanted to manifest in your life may not have come to fruition.

And you’re probably wondering what does this have to do with hooping?

You might be able to relate to this picture… the feeling of disappointment after all the hard work, blood and sweat, and you don’t see or feel the abundance in your life.
In other words, no results, nothing new, no abundance…absolutely nothing came from all the hard work you put into creating what you wanted in your life.
This can be with anything in your life, including hooping.

When a hooper can’t master a skill after hours of practice, when a hooper can’t bring all the hoops he or she owns due to space, or when a hooper only has a few hoops and would love the ability to purchase more hoops of different colors and sizes.

Here is a lesson I learned, and it might help you. Rather than focusing on what you don’t have, focus on what you do have.

You may not have achieved the results you wanted, or you may not have gained anything new from all your hard work.

Focus on the good hard work you have done and accomplished and what abundance was created out of that.

If you look at what you do have rather than what it isn’t there, you will realize you’ve gained some things that you didn’t realize you had. Shift your focus and you will see that you did gain some results and gain some good things in your life. You just didn’t know they were there because you were focusing on lack rather than what is there, what you do have.

One of the things I wanted to manifest in my life was the ability to hula hoop. With hours of practice, I managed to learn some hooping tricks, to do some hoop dancing, and purchase several hula hoops along the way for some hooping fun.

I don’t have tons of hoops that some hoopers have because I am not striving to be a professional hooper. I am striving to add some fun into my life and hooping allows me to have fun with the added benefit of exercise.

I am appreciative for the few hoops I do have and several basic and intermediate tricks I have learned and mastered enough for me to do some hoop dancing.
I have manifested a few hooping flows that most expert hoopers do while dancing, and I don’t know how to do any of the advanced tricks. However, I have come a long way with my hooping, and I am just going to take time to enjoy the fruits of my labor for now.

The moral of this story is…

Focus on what you have accomplished, manifested in your life that you wanted, and the abundance that you have in your life. When you focus on what you lack, you might create more of it due to negative feelings from it and this can lead to a decrease of motivation.

The fact is we all have the tendency to focus on what we don’t have, what we still want to manifest, and where we don’t feel abundant, and the areas in our lives that we would like to have more abundance. Many of us want to manifest love or a career we would love, or manifest and have more abundance of time, money, and lifestyle freedom.

Sometimes what you think you are lacking may be an abundance in someone else’s eyes. For example, you might feel you don’t have enough money in your bank account and would love to manifest more money. Someone else who sees the amount of money in your bank account may think it is a good amount compared to what they have.

Remember:

Focus on what you have in your life, and realize you have more than you thought. Appreciate the fruits of your labor.

If you are driven to taking care of you and to being heard, then

Contact me here and I’ll get you started on the right path.

Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Transition Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu is an expert Transition Navigator who will help you to navigate through your biggest challenges about yourself when going through your career, relationship, health, or other life transitions.

Through my programs: WORRY Eliminator, Color Code Personality, and Discover Your Sacred Gifts, I teach you how to deliberately use and navigate the program that will get you to live more of your Soul’s purpose.

As a Transition Navigator, I will help you to design, navigate, and manifest the results you want in your life with peace, happiness, ease, and grace. Together we solve your problems so that you create a whole new way of looking at life.

August HOOP With Grace

What do you do to celebrate yourself? How often do you celebrate you? Do you celebrate yourself for every good thing you do, or for your accomplishments?

I am all about celebrating this month because it is my birthday month! Woo hoo!
I am a year older, and a year wiser.

I am all for wisdom!

Being that this month is my birthday month, it got me thinking about celebrations.
We celebrate on special occasions such as birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, etc.

How many of us celebrate every day? Do you celebrate every day?

There are plenty of things to celebrate that we do every day. The celebrations don’t have to be big or elaborate. We can all celebrate just by doing small things to treat ourselves.
I think sometimes we become so busy that we forget to celebrate us.

You’re probably wondering what does hula hooping have to do with celebrations anyway?!

Here is a picture of me not in a celebrating mood and totally ignoring my beautiful hoop even though it is clearly there.

You are doing the same thing with you.

Think about all the activities and tasks you did, and you ignored how hard or what wonderful work you did for that day. It’s as if you ignored yourself and your accomplishments that you made on that day

Focus on the activities or tasks that you got done rather than thinking about the activities and tasks that you didn’t finish, or all the mistakes you made. When you focus on all the activities and tasks that you got done on that day, you realize there are plenty of things you can celebrate.

The other part is also celebrate all you (and I mean all of you). The good, bad, and ugly. We all have the good, bad, and ugly, and that includes me. It makes up who we are, and all of these parts can be transmuted depending on the situation.

The good can be transmuted to the bad and ugly, and the bad and ugly can be transmuted to good depending on the situation and what we do to transmute these parts.

Here is an example of this: Nurturing is usually good, but too much of it can feel like smothering to another person. Aggression is bad, but with the right tone and words it can feel more like being assertive which is not a bad thing. Losing your temper can be ugly, but when you learn from it and learn how to be more patient, then you have transmuted it to become a good thing.

Coming to a full hooping circle… It’s all about celebrating you (all of you) every day because life is short, so why not celebrate you for all you have accomplished on that day because no two days are ever exactly alike.

Here is a picture of me celebrating me with my hoop!

One of the ways I celebrate me, and my day is hoop dancing, baby!

You have heard the saying, “Time flies; it flies never to be regained.”

Enjoy every moment because the moment will never repeat itself. The moments may appear similar at times, but it is never the same.

The moral of this story is…

Celebrate you every day. Small simple celebrations are all that is needed such as giving yourself a pat on the back, buying yourself a small inexpensive gift, or shouting out loud, “You rock!”

The fact is we don’t live forever, so it’s time to celebrate our lives every single day that we are living. Even on bad days, there is a little something to celebrate such as the fact you survived your bad day, and tomorrow will be better.

Remember:

This day will pass, you wake up to a new day, and each day is different in its own way. Take time to celebrate you each day because you deserve it.

I am sing along to the song “Celebration” by Lionel Richie and the Commodores.

All this talk and singing about celebrating got me going so I am taking off to do some celebrating of my own!

If you are driven to taking care of you and to being heard, then

Contact me here and I’ll get you started on the right path.

Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Transition Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu is an expert Transition Navigator who will help you to navigate through your biggest challenges about yourself when going through your career, relationship, health, or other life transitions.

Through my programs: WORRY Eliminator, Color Code Personality, and Discover Your Sacred Gifts, I teach you how to deliberately use and navigate the program that will get you to live more of your Soul’s purpose.

As a Transition Navigator, I will help you to design, navigate, and manifest the results you want in your life with peace, happiness, ease, and grace. Together we solve your problems so that you create a whole new way of looking at life.

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES… Uncover Misunderstandings

Why do misunderstandings occur?

What are some ways that misunderstanding occurs in your conversations?

In what ways are you able to repair misunderstandings and gain a better understanding in your conversations?

Sometimes during your communication with other people, you are speaking, and a misunderstanding may occur.

You might have realized a misunderstanding has occurred either by the response given or someone outright stating the fact saying something like “You misunderstood what I said.”

What can you do make sure there is mutual understanding and then uncover any potential misunderstandings in your conversations?

Here are three tips that may help you to uncover misunderstandings in your communication:

Tip #1 Perception

How each person perceives the situation or how their story is different.

Tip #2 Accept and Learn from failure

Know that each person has had some experience with communication failure or misunderstandings and the best way to deal with it is to learn from it.

Tip #3 Listen

Listen to understand rather than to reply or respond quickly to what the other person has just stated.

The next time you are in a communication situation and want to be able uncover misunderstandings, just remember PALL (pronounced pal). PALL will help you to repair misunderstandings and to create more conversations filled with better understanding.

Perception

Accept & Learn

Listen

If you are driven to communicate with confidence, have your messages, be heard and understood, and repair any communication breakdown in your personal communication relationship, then you should take a look at my ebook 5 Strategies For Effective Companion Communication! Grab your free copy by signing up below:

Get The eBook

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu believes there is a solution to every problem including communication and conversation problems. Everyone can find the solution they seek by using the guidance of grace that is in you, with the grace of spiritual support, and Grace –me– as your Communication Navigator and support system.

My passion is to help sensitive, conflict-phobic, and introverted women have effective communication so they feel valued and heard in any conversation.

Through studying and observations, I’ve realized why communication breakdown occurs and the solutions to solving those problems. I’ve presented these solutions so that communicative partners can achieve effective communication!

November HOOP With Grace

What are you grateful for? How do you keep track of what you are grateful for? Do you keep a gratitude journal or say a list of things you are grateful for in the morning before you start your day activities and/or at night before going to bed?

In the United States, we celebrate Thanksgiving on the third Thursday in the month of November every year.

I admit I love Thanksgiving because I love eating cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes with gravy and stuffing, and going into a happy state of turkey coma.

Thanksgiving itself holds a special place in my heart because of the word, “thanksgiving” and what it means to me.

The word “thanksgiving” means giving thanks which is all about gratitude.

So for my November blog story I am devoting the whole month of November to gratitude.

Of course I do my best to practice gratitude everyday; however, I must admit that there have been days or a couple of weeks where I have skipped writing in my gratitude journal.

For the month of November, rather than being mindful and reflective for just one day, I am going to be mindful, be in the present moment, and reflect everyday in November of the people, events, and things I am grateful for that has shown up for me this past year before moving into the new year.

I invite you to join me in the practice of gratitude during this month of November. Practice being mindful, being in the present moment and reflecting on all the people, events, and things you are grateful for this past year before you move into the new year.

I don’t know about you, but I can get so wrapped up in my busy day with all my to do list that I become overwhelmed. So much so that I sometimes think what do I have to be grateful for?

Sometimes I’m in my own pity party and I can’t think of a single thing I should be grateful for.

So what does this have to do with a hula hoop, you might ask?

Well, when I am in my state of being in my own pity party, it feels as if I am alone. I might start to kick things away that are important to me such as the people in my life, and things that bring me joy such as my hoop.

As you can clearly see, I am not in the state of feeling or being in gratitude, and am kicking my hoop away. Clearly there is no joy.

Would you want to spend any time with this person? (To be honest, I wouldn’t.)

One of the ways to break down the wall, is the willingness to get out of the pity party that we’ve invited ourselves into.

The other is to get into the state of gratitude. What am I grateful for?

At first you might ask this question in a sarcastic tone, but if you really are willing to step into the state of gratitude, you might come up with one thing which might sound stupid to you such as ‘I am breathing’.

Yes! Lean into whatever it is because that is a start.

Think about it… the simple gratitude toward breathing is so important. If you and I aren’t breathing, we aren’t alive. If we are not alive, we can’t try something new today.

Then, see if you can come up with another thing you are grateful for, and another, and soon you will be on a roll! And you might start to see that you have more things to be grateful for than you realized.

Clearly this person has found her flow by being in the state of gratitude.

I don’t know about you; I would love to spend time with this person.

The moral of this story is…

Find gratitude even if it is just one item because that is a start no matter how overwhelmed you might feel. Let everything go and be in the present moment when you think about things you are grateful for. Then you will start to feel and be in the flow of gratitude.

It’s easy to be wrapped up in your busy life and become so overwhelmed that you end up throwing yourself a pity party. It’s lonely when you’re in a pity party, and others can certainly join you in your pity party, but is anyone having fun?

Even if you’re in a pity party with others, you will still feel lonely because everyone is thinking only of themselves and of their own problems and issues.

Remember:

Remember you can choose to stay in your pity party by wallowing in your overwhelming stress, anxiety, whatever it might be or you can choose to leave the party by being in the present moment and being in gratitude. Which one will you choose? Choose wisely.

If you are driven to taking care of you and to being heard, then

Contact me here and I’ll get you started on the right path.

Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Transition Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu is an expert Transition Navigator who will help you to navigate through your biggest challenges about yourself when going through your career, relationship, health, or other life transitions.

Through my programs: WORRY Eliminator, Color Code Personality, and Discover Your Sacred Gifts, I teach you how to deliberately use and navigate the program that will get you to live more of your Soul’s purpose.

As a Transition Navigator, I will help you to design, navigate, and manifest the results you want in your life with peace, happiness, ease, and grace. Together we solve your problems so that you create a whole new way of looking at life.

December HOOP With Grace

What are your thoughts on giving and receiving? Do you find it easier to give than to receive or vice versa? What are your feelings towards giving and receiving (gifts, compliments, money, etc.)?

Many countries will be celebrating in December and some will celebrate by wishing each other Happy (Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and so forth) while others may exchange gifts or give donations to charities.

December to me is a month about giving and receiving which is the perfect way to end this blog series for 2021.

Throughout 2021 I provided content about “How One Obtains Peace (HOOP)” and you probably have figured out how my hula hoops fit into my content.

I have received great feedback from you about my blog stories as well.

The best way to create a good balance and flow is to create a balance of giving and receiving.

You might be asking yourself, What does a hula hoop have to do with giving and receiving?

I’m glad you asked.

I invite you to picture this…
Imagine that your hula hoops are a great value to you. You gave all of your hoops away because of guilt or wanting to make people happy, and then you were left none. How would you feel?

I am guessing that you might feel sad and feel like you weren’t meant to have any hula hoops which can lead you down a path of poverty thinking.

Poverty thinking that it is wrong or bad to want to keep one hula hoop when others don’t have one, or there aren’t enough hula hoops to go around, and hula hoops are expensive so it may be a long time until you can own another one.

And this can lead to…

Imagine this… Let’s say you received all the hula hoops! Yes, you might be happy because now you have lots of hula hoops; however, this can also lead to a path of greed.

Greed that wants more because you feel you don’t have enough hula hoops to satisfy all the tricks and dance moves you want to do, and you’re afraid to give or share your hula hoops because you may not get them back or receive any more.

Hopefully through the images you can see that giving or receiving too much or too little creates an unbalance flow and leaves you feel stuck.

Creating a balance of giving and receiving creates a nice balance flow of things coming and going consistently like a well-run water wheel.

When you have and are in a good balance of giving and receiving, then you will be able to maintain a happy and peaceful state of giving and receiving.

You are in peace knowing and understanding that there is a continuous flow of coming and going that never stops and thus an abundance of flow continues with ease.

The moral of this story is…

Create a balance of giving and receiving. Don’t be afraid or feel guilty about receiving and end up giving too much because of guilt. Don’t let poverty thinking or greed get the best of you and convince you that you only want to receive and not give because you are afraid of not having enough.

There is no sadness, guilt, worry, anxiety, or fear of not having enough when you are balanced. There is always enough when you are in a balanced flow of giving and receiving.

Remember:

You can create a balanced flow of giving and receiving just like a well-run water wheel. The water wheel picks up (receives) the right amount of water and dumps (gives away) the right amount of water, thus creating a continuous balanced flow with ease.

I love giving and receiving so much… that there will be new monthly blog series coming in 2022!

Yes! I will be providing and giving out new content because I love to hear and receive feedback of what you love and what to add.

If you are driven to taking care of you and to being heard, then

Contact me here and I’ll get you started on the right path.

Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Transition Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu is an expert Transition Navigator who will help you to navigate through your biggest challenges about yourself when going through your career, relationship, health, or other life transitions.

Through my programs: WORRY Eliminator, Color Code Personality, and Discover Your Sacred Gifts, I teach you how to deliberately use and navigate the program that will get you to live more of your Soul’s purpose.

As a Transition Navigator, I will help you to design, navigate, and manifest the results you want in your life with peace, happiness, ease, and grace. Together we solve your problems so that you create a whole new way of looking at life.

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES… Opinions

Are you afraid of conflicts so you avoid it as much as possible?
What are some opinions that you have that other people may agree or disagree with?
What opinions are you willing or unwilling to share with others?
Why are you willing to share your opinions or not?

Everyone has an opinion, and I am sure you have an opinion about something. I know I do.

Whether or not you are comfortable sharing your opinion with other people may be in question based on how comfortable you are with sharing your opinion with others.

How comfortable are you when someone agrees or disagrees with your opinions? Or a better question might be how comfortable does a person make you feel when you agree or disagree with them?

The person’s response or reaction when you share your opinion may either make you feel comfortable in sharing your opinion further or make you feel that perhaps it’s better to keep your opinion to yourself to avoid any conflict, especially when you or the other person has a disagreeing point of view.

Here are five tips or questions to ask yourself before you consider sharing your opinions:

Tip #1 TRUE, is it true?

Are there facts that can back up your opinion? Are there facts that can back up the other person’s opinion when there are differing opinions?

Tip #2 HELPFUL, is it helpful?

Is the information being shared helpful to each person? How is it helpful? Does it bring more knowledge or value to each of the people involved?

Tip #3 INSPIRING, is it inspiring?

Does the discussion of the opinions inspire the person to take action? What action might that be? Does it inspire growth, learning, or wisdom?

Tip #4 NECESSARY, is it necessary?

Is it necessary to persuade the other person to think the way that you do? Is it necessary for you think the way that person wants you to? Is it necessary to continue the conflict when both parties are unable to agree?

Tip #5 Kind, is it kind?

Are the words you say and use impeccable? It is okay to disagree and have arguments; however, are the words being used during the argument kind? You can state the way you feel and think without name calling and being vicious.

The next time you are in a communication situation, and you are not sure whether or not to share your opinion, just remember THINK:

Is it True ?

Is it Helpful ?

Is it Inspiring ?

Is it Necessary ?

Is it Kind ?

If you are driven to communicate with confidence, have your messages, be heard and understood, and repair any communication breakdown in your personal communication relationship, then you should take a look at my ebook 5 Strategies For Effective Companion Communication! Grab your free copy by signing up below:

Get The eBook

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu believes there is a solution to every problem including communication and conversation problems. Everyone can find the solution they seek by using the guidance of grace that is in you, with the grace of spiritual support, and Grace –me– as your Communication Navigator and support system.

My passion is to help sensitive, conflict-phobic, and introverted women have effective communication so they feel valued and heard in any conversation.

Through studying and observations, I’ve realized why communication breakdown occurs and the solutions to solving those problems. I’ve presented these solutions so that communicative partners can achieve effective communication!

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES… Messages (Hidden)

What hidden messages have you discovered or understood behind words that were spoken to you? 

What are some messages or meanings you have hidden behind your spoken words?
Why is it easy or difficult for others to understand those hidden message behind your words?
Why is it easy or difficult for you to hear and understand other people’s hidden message behind their spoken words?

Depending upon your background and the culture you grew up in, you may or may not understand about the hidden messages spoken behind words.

Here is an example: If you’ve ever watched the TV show ‘Fresh Off The Boat’ there was an episode that really jumped out at me.

In the episode where Jessica and her sister talked on the phone and Jessica’s sister was saying how excited she was to visit her family for Thanksgiving, there was a subtext of the meaning behind each of the words being spoken.

Even though we may understand the literal words, there was a hidden message, a subtext of the meaning behind those spoken words between the sisters.

I can tell you… this is very common in Asian culture. I know because I lived and continue to live with it throughout my life.

I have always needed to be careful about what I said because the meaning behind the words is just as equally important, and I dared not to offend anyone or try to get myself or anyone in trouble.

Through years of training with my parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and all the other Asian adults and children I have encountered, I have become highly skilled in understanding the hidden messages behind their spoken words.

My husband, on the other hand, did not and continues to try to learn this skill of understanding the hidden message. You see my husband is Scottish and his family members are very direct.

What they say is exactly what they mean, but I have discovered that sometimes even with his family there would be a bit of meaning behind their conversations. However, I would say at least 90-95% of the time there were no hidden messages behind their spoken words.

In my family though, 95-100% of the time there are definitely hidden messages behind the spoken words.

If you are thinking it is difficult and complicated to speak with my family, you are correct!

Even the questions that my family ask have hidden meanings behind them. A simple ‘how are you’ doesn’t just mean ‘how are you?’ It can mean how is your job, are you still living in the same apartment, when are you going to…?

I had to teach my husband about understanding the hidden messages, hidden questions, subtext, reading between the lines, and so on.

Here are three tips that I shared with my husband that may help you to understand the hidden messages behind the spoken words, the subtext, and read between the lines, so to speak:

Tip #1 Rationale for the question asked or statement made

What information is the person trying to obtain or want you to know? Is it for their benefit or yours?

Tip #2 Eye contact/Body language

How are they looking at you when they ask you the question or telling you the information? Are they looking at you or giving you a side view?

Are they leaning towards you or away? Are they stiff or relaxed? This can show you how interested they are and that they want you to know what they are really asking you. Or what they want you to know behind their hidden messages.

Tip #3 Tone of voice

If you can’t see them and they can’t see you, then you can rely on the tone of voice. Is the voice a bit stiff, formal, relaxed, a fake smile behind the words, warmth, etc? This will tell you about the hidden messages behind the spoken words.

So the next time you are in a communication situation where you need to understand hidden messages or respond to hidden message, just remember RET and KISS.

R– Rational for question or statement

E– Eye contact

T– Tone of voice

Use KISS (Keep It Short and Simple) when responding to the hidden message!

If you are driven to communicate with confidence, have your messages, be heard and understood, and repair any communication breakdown in your personal communication relationship, then you should take a look at my ebook 5 Strategies For Effective Companion Communication! Grab your free copy by signing up below:

Get The eBook

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu believes there is a solution to every problem including communication and conversation problems. Everyone can find the solution they seek by using the guidance of grace that is in you, with the grace of spiritual support, and Grace –me– as your Communication Navigator and support system.

My passion is to help sensitive, conflict-phobic, and introverted women have effective communication so they feel valued and heard in any conversation.

Through studying and observations, I’ve realized why communication breakdown occurs and the solutions to solving those problems. I’ve presented these solutions so that communicative partners can achieve effective communication!

GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES… MONITOR Feelings

How comfortable are you with feelings and your ability to monitor feelings in your communication?

What are some ways you or the person you are communicating with monitor feelings in a conversation?

What makes it easy or difficult for you and the person you communicate with to monitoring feelings during a conversation?

Why do you monitor feelings (or not) in your conversations with others?

You might find, as you engage in conversation, that the mood either starts to change or did completely change. And you might be aware that the mood started to change subtly or dramatically during the conversation.

You might be aware of why the mood changed and sometimes you’re not.

What happened?!

First, you and said person were having a nice conversation. Everything was going well, and then one of you said something. Either you did or said something, or the other person did or said something that suddenly seemed to change the mood of the conversation.

Now, at this point you might be aware of it, and the other person might or might not be depending upon how well you or the other person are good at monitoring these feelings in the conversation.

Usually if one of you is good at this and realized the exact point at which the mood changed and the reason for it, then you might be able to repair the breakdown. You or the other person might apologize for what was said or provide further explanation for better understanding.

If either of you are not good at monitoring feelings, then one of you will carry on as if nothing has happened while the other one gets more annoyed, angry, sad or embarrassed depending upon the conversational topic or situation.

Sometimes conversations that start out so well suddenly lead to an explosion or someone walking out.

What can you do to monitor feelings so that you can have a nice productive conversation and not end up with an explosive scenario?

Here are four tips that you can use that may help you to monitor feelings in your communication:

Tip #1 M – Movement (body movement/posture)

What is the body movement or posture of the person you’re talking with? Is it relaxed, opened, tensed, limited body movement, or is a body part crossed when it was initially uncrossed?

What are the person’s mannerisms? Are they the same or have they changed?

Tip #2 O – Oh, the look (eye contact/gaze)

What is the person’s eye contact like? Are their eyes relaxed, glaring at you or looking away?

Tip #3 O – Oh, the face (facial expression)

What is the person’s face like? Is it relaxed, tensed, eyebrows furrowing, tense mouth with or without the smile?

Tip #4 D – Declaration (tone of voice)

What is the declaration or the tone of voice the person is using? Does the tone sound different from being light and happy to tense, angry, annoyed, and so on?

The next time you are in a communication situation and want to be able to monitor feelings to have nice productive conversation, just remember MOOD (this acronym helped me and I think it will help you as well).

Movement

Oh, the look

Oh, the face

Declaration

If you are driven to communicate with confidence, have your messages, be heard and understood, and repair any communication breakdown in your personal communication relationship, then you should take a look at my ebook 5 Strategies For Effective Companion Communication! Grab your free copy by signing up below:

Get The eBook

Warm regards,

Grace CW Liu
Communication Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com

ABOUT GRACE

Grace CW Liu believes there is a solution to every problem including communication and conversation problems. Everyone can find the solution they seek by using the guidance of grace that is in you, with the grace of spiritual support, and Grace –me– as your Communication Navigator and support system.

My passion is to help sensitive, conflict-phobic, and introverted women have effective communication so they feel valued and heard in any conversation.

Through studying and observations, I’ve realized why communication breakdown occurs and the solutions to solving those problems. I’ve presented these solutions so that communicative partners can achieve effective communication!

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