GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Upset]
In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.
In COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, the fifth component we’re going to explore is Upset.
If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters can encounter people or situations where the protagonists can become upset with a person, a group of people, or an entire situation. Sometimes it can be a person or a group of people who are upset with the main characters either because something didn’t go according to plan or because the protagonists do something to upset somebody as they go through their journey.
Encountering different people and situations isn’t always easy and so for you, as the main character of your own story you will undoubtedly either upset someone or someone or situation will upset you.
That is just part of being human and a part of the human experience.
What do you do when you’re upset? Or when someone upsets you when things don’t go according to plan or something was said that shouldn’t have been said that left someone feeling upset about the specific comment?
When a person is truly upset, speaking and acting irrationally avoid saying ‘calm down’.
Even though that is exactly what the person needs to do, saying ‘calm down’ will just set the person off even more. How can a person be calm when everything is falling apart.
Would you be able to remain calm if everything was falling apart and didn’t go according to plan or wasn’t what you wanted nor expected?
Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…
Magic phrase
(If you’re the one who is upset): I’m upset about______(be specific about what you’re upset about. If it was said, state the exact statement that upset you, if it was an action, state the exact action).
(If someone is upset with you): I heard you say that you’re upset about _______(repeat back the list of items that the person listed he or she was upset about. Use the person’s exact words or words that are close to what the person said). I’m sorry to hear that this happened. I would be upset as well. I will do my best to help find a solution for you.
The whole idea is to avoid blame. Avoid putting blame on yourself and others. Blaming doesn’t help to solve an issue; in fact, it just creates more problems and headaches. Rather than blaming, the focus is on finding ways to resolve issues and conflicts.
One of the ways to resolve the issue is to acknowledge that you and/or the person is upset and given each person has free will, meaning the right to feel what he or she is feeling, then the person has the right to feel upset even if you might disagree.
Whether you agree or disagree does not matter.
What matters is that you acknowledge the person who is upset because of the specific reasons that were given by that person and you show him or her you care by validating what the person said to you.
In return you want the person who hurt you to validate your feelings by repeating what you said so that you know you were seen, heard, and understood.
The truth is that when you’re upset or if someone is upset with you, you and/or the other person wants to be validated.
You validate someone by repeating back what the person said.
As a main character in your story, you don’t have to agree or disagree with the reason for someone being upset and likewise the person doesn’t have to agree or disagree with you when you’re the one who is upset. You can certainly choose to validate a person’s feeling or not.
Validating someone who is upset is an easier path that will lead you to your happily ever after.
If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.
Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com
GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Mistakes]
In this COMMUNICATES series you are the Main Character!
In COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, the fourth component we’re going to explore is Mistake.
If you’re into reading or telling stories, you know that the main characters can encounter people or situations where they are being blamed for a mistake that occurred as they go through their journeys.
Encountering different people and situations isn’t always easy and so for you, as the main character you will undoubtedly encounter a situation where you are blamed for a mistake or something that occurred either by you or by someone else.
That is just a natural part of the human experience.
What do you do when you come across a situation where you blame yourself, blame others, or you’re being blamed for something?
Someone might say something like this to you: “This is your fault” or “This wouldn’t have happened if you had or hadn’t done [x,y,z…]”.
What is a good way to respond when someone makes those comments to you?
Here is a Magic Phrase that will lead to happily ever after…
Magic phrase: I apologize for _______[state the mistake, take ownership of the mistake that was made by you and not by other people] and I have learned to do_______[state the solution that you learned from the mistake] or I am going to change _____[state the specific changes you are going to make].
This magic phrase shows that you are willing to take ownership of your mistake. Be courageous and face it so a solution can be found and made rather than hiding from it and making it worse.
It shows that you are willing to change or make the necessary adjustments to improve your situation rather than keeping things at the status quo.
It’s okay to make mistakes! That’s how we learn. So take ownership, learn from it, and make the changes that will help solve the situation.
As the main character in your own story, you can choose to take ownership of your mistakes or not. Whatever you choose to do, there are consequences and results from each choice you make. Just make sure that whatever in whatever you choose that you choose wisely.
You are permitted to make mistakes and you will make many. After all, that is how you learn. Solutions are usually found after a mistake has been made. Mistakes aren’t the issues, the issues lie in how you treat your mistakes. If you treat them in a better way, this will lead you to your happily ever after.
If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.
Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com
A Magic Phrase For Moodiness | GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After
GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Moody]
In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.
In the COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, the third component we’re going to explore is Mood or Moody.
If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters can encounter different people with different moods and the main characters can also experience moodiness in themselves as they go through their journey.
Encountering different people and situations aren’t always easy and so you, as the main character will at times feel the different moods and becoming moody at times or come across people who are moody.
That is just part of being human and having human experiences.
What do you do when you come across moody people or when you’re the one who is moody?
Someone might say something like, “You’re overreacting” or “You’re (being) too sensitive”.
What is a way to respond or say when someone makes those comments to you?
Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…
Magic phrase: I (do) feel or felt _______(state your feeling) by the comment. I’m permitted to feel this way or I give myself permission to feel this way.
There is no blame and it’s good to state how you’re feeling by the comment because you’re stating the truth that you’re feeling.
Give yourself permission to feel and state your feelings.
Maybe you did overreact, or you were being sensitive, and that’s okay because you’re allowed to have those feelings. You are allowed to feel whatever it is your feeling.
It’s just feelings and feelings come and go, so notice your feelings, acknowledge it and know that there really isn’t a good or bad feelings even though we as humans have labeled some feelings as good and bad.
We all have had good and bad feelings, and if we’re being totally honest with ourselves those feelings can just come and go as the tides ebb and flow.
As a main character in your story, you can choose not to take the comments personally. The person making the comment is just making a comment even though it appears to be directed towards you, it’s not about you. A person speaking could be reflecting the statement back at him or her. The moodiness of the statement could be a reflection of how the other person is feeling.
You are permitted to feel your feelings and state your feelings to the person that will lead you to your happily ever after.
If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.
Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com
GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Opinion]
In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.
In the COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, the next component that we’re going to explore is Opinion
If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters are given different opinions or advice that change depending upon the perspectives of different people as to what the main characters should do to overcome the obstacles that are faced during their journey.
So, what opinions or advice are you given? And do you feel obligated to listen or follow the differing opinions that are shared with you?
What do you do in situations when people say something that is viewed as an opinion or advice that you don’t agree with?
What can you say to those people who are clearly stating an opinion or offering advice, but are treating it as fact which you simply don’t agree with?
Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…
Magic phrase: Thank you for sharing your opinion or advice.
Everyone is free to have their opinion and share his or her advice and you can certainly choose to agree or disagree.
By thanking the person you’re certainly not stating that you agree or disagree, you are showing you have good manners and appreciation by thanking the person for taking the time to share that opinion or advice with you.
Who knows if the opinion or advice could have been helpful or not. That’s up to you to choose whether you want to listen and believe and follow the person’s opinion, after all you’re the main character in your story.
As a main character, you get to choose your path and the opinions you want to believe, listen to, and follow that will lead you to your happily ever after.
If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.
Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com
A Magic Phrase For Challenges | GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After
If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.
Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com
GraceSOULutions COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After… [Challenge]
In this COMMUNICATES series just know you are the Main Character.
To begin the COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After we’re going to start with the first component: Challenge.
If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters in the stories all face challenges of some sort, whether it be to slay dragons, complete an impossible mission, or conquer some fear that must be faced and overcome.
So, what challenges are you facing?
How do you deal with challenges, especially the ones that come from your thoughts or the words you’re thinking and saying?
What about the people who challenge you by the way they speak to you in your conversations?
What can you do to overcome these challenges?
Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…
Magic phrase: Is this thought or statement creating the future I want?
A lot of times when you’re faced with a challenge you think you can’t conquer because you believe that you can’t or someone says you can’t.
However, is it the thought or statement creating the future that you want?
If not, then change the thought or statement that would create the future that you do want.
You can choose to either continue to think and say or allow others to say things that will make you stuck in a challenge or situation or you can choose to change your thoughts and statements to create the future you want.
If the other person is saying things that is not the future you want to create or what you want for the both of you, then you can say “Is this statement you’re saying what you want to create for me or for us for the future?”
Your thoughts and statements that you’re creating for your future lead you to your happily ever after.
If you’re an introverted, people pleaser, conflict-phobic person who would love to openly and confidently communicate your thoughts, feelings, and desires without the fear of arguments and criticisms so you can have your happily ever after, then click below to book your free Communication Breakthrough Session where we will discover 5 obstacles that are stopping you and One step to move you toward to living your happily ever after.
Warm regards,
Grace CW Liu
Communication Coach & Navigator
W: GraceSOULutions.com