In the COMMUNICATES Happily Ever After, the tenth component we’re going to explore is Tone Of Voice.
If you’re into reading or telling stories you know that the main characters can encounter situations where they used the wrong tone of voice or the person used the wrong tone of voice with the main characters as they go through their journey.
Encountering different people and situations isn’t always easy and so for you, as the main character you will undoubtedly cause an issue with someone or someone caused an issue with you by using or having the wrong tone of voice.
That is just part of being human and having human experiences.
What do you do when someone perceived you’ve used the wrong tone of voice or you perceive the person to use the wrong tone of voice with you?
You know the wrong tone of voice was used because you hear comments such as “Don’t use that tone of voice with me” or “I don’t like or appreciate that tone of voice you’re using” or “I found your tone of voice to be offensive.”
Magic phrases that will lead to happily ever after…
Magic phrase (if you used the wrong tone of voice): What did my tone of voice sound like to you? Thank you for bringing it to my attention. I will be more attentive to the tone of voice I’m using.
Magic phrase (if someone used the wrong tone of voice with you): I feel your tone of voice may not have matched the intention in your message you shared.
Tone of voice can be subjective and while you might have thought your tone of voice was okay, the other person didn’t perceive it that way. It doesn’t matter if you agree or not with the perceptions.
You’re asking for clarification so you can modify, thanking the person to bring awareness to you, so you can pay attention to your tone of voice and continue to have a constructive conversation.
When you perceive the person’s tone of voice as being a certain way not to your liking you can give the person the benefit of the doubt that he or she didn’t mean to use that tone of voice in that way.
You can clearly state it by reinforcing the person’s intention and the tone of voice didn’t seem to match the person’s intention.
As a main character in your story, tone of voice can be subjective, and you don’t have to agree or disagree with the person’s perception when it comes to the tone of voice. You can choose how you want to address the tone of voice and when you address it well, this can lead you to your happily ever after.
Magic Phrase For Active Listening